Jane The Virgin – Chapter Sixty-Nine
By: Sabine Aretz
This episode of Jane The Virgin opens with a throwback to 20 years ago, when young Jane (Lillianna Valenzuela; Jenna Ortega) and her best friend Lina (Kaylee Arroyo; Dayrin Martinez) were trying on outfits and kissing boys in the back of a movie theatre. Back to the present, Jane (Gina Rodriguez) is confused that her adventurous childhood friend would choose a 19th century murder mystery theme for her Bachelorette party.
After getting an alert on her phone, Xiomara (Andrea Navedo) realizes that she forgot to take the pill again. Jane informs her of the many other options she has. The two are interrupted by a phone call from Petra (Yael Grobglas) who tells Jane that Rafael (Justin Baldoni) was in a minor car accident.
At the hospital, Petra yells at Rafael for telling Katherine he was using her before the deal closed. He says he could not go through with it.
“Oh, you got Villanuevaed. – Suddenly hit by a morality crisis.”
Jane, Lina (Diane Guerrero) and her finace, Danny (Joshua Chang), are planning for the Bachelorette party. Adam (Tyler Posey) joins them and he and Danny realizes that they have seen each other before. Eventually, they find a mutual friend that Adam used to date. Curiously, Jane wants to know who the person is and is surprised to find out they are talking about a guy.
“Jane, the Heteronormative.”
Now on the patio swing, Jane and Adam talk about it. He says calling him ‘bisexual’ is fine, if she needs to put a label on it. Adam reveals he did not tell her because he did not think it was relevant and because he was nervous that things would be different.
At the Marbella, Luisa (Yara Martinez) storms in the room where Petra and Rafael are talking and yells at Rafael to go or she will call security. She accuses him of being just as obsessed with money and power as their father was. The twins (Mia and Ella Allan) come in and Petra sends them to the gift shop where Alba (Ivonne Coll) works.
“Daddy is getting kicked out of the hotel again so we’re supposed to buy something.”
Having learned that he has no place to stay, Alba brings Rafael back to the Villanueva house and says he can stay there. Rafael tells what happened with Katherine and that she was right about everything. Hurt, he also asks her to not say “I told you so.” Jane is unsure what to do.
The next day, Lina stops by and tells Jane she wants her to spend some time with Danny. Jane happily agrees until Lina tells her that she needs to get to know Danny in order to tell her if she should marry him or not. Because her sisters staged an intervention, Lina is unsure about Danny. She tells Jane what she loves about him but also what drives her crazy and explains that she does not know what to do.
On the phone with Xiomara, Jane asks for advice. Xiomara tells her that it is not her place to say something and she should, not matter what, tell Lina that Danny is great.
After hanging up, Xiomara asks Rogelio (Jaime Camil) to get a vasectomy. She explains that it is a minor procedure whereas getting sterilized is an invasive surgery and she is tired of taking the pill. Rogelio vehemently refuses.
At lunch with Adam, Jane gets jealous when the waiter (Augustine Hargrave) compliments Adam’s tattoos. She apologizes for acting weird and says she has trouble wrapping her head around it because she is not into women. Adam suggests that she may have not explored that side of herself yet.
Later, Jane talks to Xiomara about it and expresses annoyance with herself about making it such a big deal.
“When women hook up, it is looked at as sexy. But men are immediately marginalized because our whole culture revolves around the male gaze.”
When the conversation shifts to Xiomara and Rogelio’s sex life, Jane leaves. Alba comes in the room and Xiomara tells her that Rogelio does not want the vasectomy. Not surprised about this, Alba explains that Rogelio is a macho and feels like is manhood is threatened. She tells Xiomara to seduce him and show him what he will gain should he get the vasectomy.
Preparing for the Bachelorette Party, Jane is alone with Danny and tries to get to know him. The conversations is awkwardly slow and Jane finds out that Danny likes being an accountant because it is steady and he does not like drama.
In the meantime, Rogelio is struggling with a scene at work because he cannot find the truth in it. The producer tells him to get it together.
“The truth is that you are saying goodbye to the kidney stone that has been your steadfast companion for your journey down the lady scientist’s urinary track.”
A little later, he and Xiomara run into Esteban (Keller Wortham) and Xiomara asks him questions to point out to Rogelio that he would do anything to make Darci happy. She, then, seduces Rogelio and he blurs out she should make an appointment for the vasectomy.
At night in the Villanueva house, Rafael falls out of the bed. Jane hears him and tries to help. They have an emotional conversation in which Rafael reveals he feels lost. Jane comforts him and reminds him that she will always be there for him because they are family. He says he needs to forget about the shares and the Marbella and start all over again.
The next day, Xiomara and Rogelio are at the doctor’s office. Rogelio wants to make sure the doctor has done the procedure on other celebrities before. After asking a few questions, Rogelio turns to Xiomara and tells her that he wants to do it for her but does not think he can.
At work with Lina, Jane, remembering Xiomara’s advice, tells her that Danny is great and she should marry him. Lina, however, senses Jane’s hesitation, feels reassured that Danny is boring and asks Jane if she should call off the wedding. Jane reminds her that she needs to make that decision for herself.
While Luisa is angrily smashing and breaking things in her hotel room, talking to Carl (Graham Sibley), Petra walks by and hears her. Krishna (Shelly Bhalla) informs her about the conversation she overheard between Anezka (Yael Grobglas) and Magda (Priscilla Barnes) about Luisa hallucinating a person named Carl. Petra immediately calls Rafael, who explains to Jane that Luisa had a nervous breakdown during her medical residency and imagined someone named Carla. Because back then Luisa would only listen to Rafael, he feels the need to talk to her and get her to accept help.
Xiomara is angry at Rogelio for not getting the vasectomy. He explains to her that it is not about his manhood but about his fear of getting older. The procedure feels like he is moving on to the next stage, he says. She understands and tells him not to worry about the vasectomy.
“I was kind of hoping you would tell me I’m still the hot, young star you met twenty years ago.”
Jane is with Adam and one of his friends (Julien Ari) at his place. She, again, gets jealous and asks herself if they ever hooked up. Adam senses this and is mad about how things have changed since she found out about his sexuality.
Getting ready for the party, Danny shares with Jane that he feels like something is wrong with Lina because she has been acting strange. In their exchange, Jane learns that Danny actually knows Lina really well and has a surprise for her planned that suits her better than the murder mystery themed party. Danny is confused why Jane acts so surprised upon finding out how well he knows Lina. Jane tells him that she had doubts about his and Lina’s compatibility because of the awkward first conversation he and Jane had. He gets angry and walks away.
At the murder mystery Bachelorette party, Danny confronts Jane but Lina tells him that she had asked for Jane’s opinion because she has doubts about marrying him. Later, Jane and Lina talk about it and Jane reassures her that everyone is hesitant before getting married. She remembers her conversation with Alba and Xiomara before marrying Michael and says she also had many doubts. Lina realizes how similar Jane and Danny are and feels confident marrying him because her friendship with Jane is the longest relationship she has ever had.
“I’m marrying the male version of you!”
After they have a moment, Jane leans in to kiss Lina but immediately apologizes, saying she does not know what she was thinking. Jane tells Lina she is freaked out that Adam kept his sexuality from her, not that he is bisexual. Lina tells her that she is lying to herself and needs to figure out what is really going on.
Meanwhile, Rafael talks to Luisa, who refuses to believe that Carl is a hallucination. After calling Anezka, who tells her that she cannot see Carl, Luisa starts to believe it and is devastated.
Rogelio is shooting the scene where he has to say goodbye to the kidney stone. He manages to connect to the script by talking to his penis instead.
Back at the Bachelorette party, Danny and Lina have reunited and Danny surprises her with a striptease dance number. Xiomara gets a text from Rogelio saying that he is getting a vasectomy.
Later that night, Jane tells Adam that she has questions about his sexuality. He reassures her that it is okay to ask and explains that bisexuality is not a stepping stone into coming out as gay. To him, it means being open to a connection with a man or a woman. Adam also makes it clear that he only wants to be with her and is not interested in anyone else, regardless of gender. Jane is happy about their conversation, and they kiss.
In the meantime, Luisa goes to see Rafael at Jane’s house to tell him she is checking herself into a psychiatric hospital and giving him back his shares. He says he is happy she is getting help and that getting back the shares is not why he reached out. Luisa tells him she knows, and they share an emotional moment.
The next day, Rafael and Petra learn that due to Luisa’s mental state, she cannot change the contract and give Rafael her shares. Instead, as she decided six weeks ago, in the event of her incapacitation, all her shares go to Anezka.
Anezka celebrates becoming a hotel owner with a bottle of champagne, Magda and Carl, who turns out to be real after all.