Superior Donuts – Is There A Problem, Officer?
By: Jay Smith
Franco (Jermaine Fowler) and Arthur (Judd Hirsch) greet an angry Randy (Katey Segal) as she walks into the shop. She sarcastically answers the mundane questions of Carl (David Koechner) and Fawz (Maz Jobrani) before sitting down and explaining the bad mood is from a lack of sleep and only wants coffee. She mentions the establishment “Coffee, Coffee, Coffee” and Fawz jokes he hopes there’s “bathroom, bathroom, bathrooms” when she again uses sarcasm to ask a question about what the establishment offers. Randy moves to an empty table and Franco pours her a cup of coffee. He half jokes about taking everything that’s a potential weapon off the table including the coffee before giving it back and giving Randy an extra helping of whipped cream on her pastry since she had a rough night and still not having help on the force. Sofia (Diane Guerrero) walks in with food and, of course, Arthur insults her first by saying, “I smell diesel and patchouli. Your roach-coach for hippies must be parked right out in front.” Not missing a beat, Sofia insults Arthur right back by referencing the film Up! by comparing them to Russell and Carl. Sofia finally offers the food in exchange for the wifi password and with Arthur being older and out of touch he doesn’t understand what she was asking at first – even referring to “Venmo” as a Spanish word. Franco offers the wifi and a table to Sofia and before going she thanks Franco in English and thanks Arthur in Spanish. As a retort he says “Venmo!” like he would “De nada.” After Arthur declines the meal, Carl takes it and (being the ditz he is he) assumes Sofia is talking about more sleep when she mentions one of the attributes of the meal is more stamina in bed. Sweatpants (Rell Battle) comes into the shop upset and says, “Franco, it happened again.” Not knowing what he means Franco asks if he sent his grandmother another inappropriate picture. Sweatpants shows him a video of their friend Big Mike’s little brother, Lil Mike, being assaulted by a cop. After watching the video closely, the guys do a double take at the video and Randy before Franco asks if it’s indeed her. She admits it’s her and we can see the disappointment in Franco’s face. Carl says “that’s so wrong” and the group thinks he’s referring to Randy’s admission, but it was about goat cheese and watermelon mingling together in the dish Sofia made.
Randy defends herself by saying she didn’t know “Little” Mike and states the video doesn’t show both sides. She recalls the events from her perspective and the explanation isn’t good enough for Sweatpants or Franco, especially since more force was uses after Lil Mike was already handcuffed. Without seeing the video, Arthur comes to Randy’s defense because he knows she’s a good cop and mentions some accolades like her winning “Foxy Fuzz Over 40.” Randy defends herself some more by asking if the guys know how tough it is to be a cop right now with the city being so hostile and Franco retorts that they’re hostile because of the actions she displayed in the video. Carl tries to de-escalate the situation by being a mediator between Franco and Randy, but fails miserably. Randy explains any small routine can turn big and Franco antagonizes her by mentioning her weapons of protection, but Sweatpants ruins the point by mentioning their hats because a hat was used on him once. Neither party wants to listen to the other and being upset by Franco questioning her, Randy leaves. Arthur again defends Randy, but Franco doesn’t want to hear especially since Arthur didn’t see the video and Randy’s behavior last night is regular to him and his friends by other cops. After being coerced and to prove Randy is a good person in and out her uniform, Arthur agrees to drive Franco in his car so that they can tail her for a night.
Arthur is driving them around and Franco admits he’s never been more scared because of Arthur’s driving. He makes a joke saying the last time he mentioned Jesus so much was when he was being dunked in a river. They pull over and Arthur pulls out binoculars and admits he wanted to do police surveillance and put together a stake out kit. Arthur exclaims “oh my god,” making Franco nervous yet it was only said because Randy walked into “Excellent Donuts” – a more expensive rival to their shop. Arthur is upset and Franco tries to reason with him since the shop is closed at night, but Arthur isn’t having it. Randy knocks on the window, scaring both guys. Randy is still annoyed by the video causing a rift between her and Franco when they hear glass breaking. Randy sighs since she has to stop the car burglary, but before she goes she tells Arthur to go to bed and Franco to go to hell. Prior to leaving they hear a gunshot and see Randy is hurt. Randy tells Franco to stay in the car and she radios for backup.
Fawz, Franco and Arthur are in the shop when Sofia comes in and asks about Randy. Fawz gives an update that she’s okay and already out the hospital. Arthur mentions a gathering for her at the cop bar when Carl comes in with news about the shooter. Franco, Sofia and Fawz all pray the shooter doesn’t represent their demographic: black, Latino or Muslim. Carl says the article doesn’t say and the three minorities high five each other because they know the shooter was white based off the way media handles these types of situations. Carl shows them a card he picked for them to sign for Randy and because of the community the card was specific and says “sorry we got shot in the shoulder.” Arthur rounds the guy up to leave and Sofia is surprised Franco is going. Arthur inserts himself into the conversation and says of course Franco is going because they’re friends and the beef they had before the shooting is over. Arthur retrieves the cake he almost forgets and harshly denies Sofia’s input on adding a healthy organic treat to the mix for Randy. Sofia asks if Randy and Franco are indeed cool and mentions what he’s thinking out loud with a swift zip of her jacket when she admits to knowing what he’s thinking – him feeling bad for Randy getting shot but still being upset about the video and possibly thinking about Sofia inappropriately. He’s happy she’s okay, but her being a “hero” doesn’t sit well. Sofia tells the story of a high school racist to sympathize with Franco and gives the advice that if they’re really friends he should be able to tell Randy how he feels. Franco jokes that him taking the high road involves him being high and only having one drink at the party. At the bar, Carl and Arthur ask Randy about being shot.
Franco finally shows up with his fake happy face and clothes smelling like weed. Arthur offers Franco a drink when a fellow cop has a toast for Randy. Franco gets really uncomfortable with the abundance of times “hero” is said so he downs his drink and heads for the door. Before he can go, Arthur wants to thank him got admitting he’s wrong and this sets Franco off. He finally admits he doesn’t fully forgive Randy, doesn’t want to hear any more of Arthur’s opinion until he watches the video and he doesn’t want Randy to be like the corrupt cops in the city. A group of cops surround Franco after this statement and he hastily makes his exit before the night goes badly for him. Arthur follows Franco out the door and asks to see the video. After a minor difficulty, Arthur sees the video and is speechless.
Randy comes into the shop because Arthur sent her a text saying both his hands were in the mixer. Arthur invites her in and admits it was a lie in order for them to talk. He explains he saw the video and believes her when she says everything was justified, but wants to know what’s really going on because of the way she looked in the video. Randy finally admits that the city is different which is causing pressure. Arthur suggests she take a real break and before she can fully object to it he tells Randy her father took a break. Franco comes in and Arthur, who created this plan for the two to talk to each other, leaves the room. Randy runs the idea of a break by Franco and he agrees that she should. He pulls out a pastry and puts some whipped cream on it for her, but since she’s going on vacation Randy wants the can and sprays some into her mouth.
Arthur brings in “Excellent Donuts” for honest feedback. Fawz misinterprets this and rips into Arthur’s shirt. The gang bites into the donuts and they all agree they’re overpriced and awful like Arthur’s shirt. Carl admits it’s better to go to the establishment on Tuesdays when there’s a deal for the donuts and coffee. Arthur calls Carl a SOB and Carl tries to make it better by saying he was spying on the establishment and admits he goes because the shop isn’t open at night.