Abbott Elementary – Ringworm

By starrymag | October 23, 2024

By: Atiya Irvin-Mitchell

 

 

We open at a PTA meeting and Tariq (Zack Fox) and Krystal (Raven Goodwin) are reminding everyone that uniforms purchased from department stores will get students sent home. The good news is the PTA is convinced the only district-approved store to give Abbott families a 30% discount for the rest of the month. Additionally, some parents are worried about the golf course and what it’ll mean for the community. Some parents are concerned about being priced out, but Barbara (Sheryl Lee Ralph) says the golf course will be built whether they like it or not. Tariq suggests he could pull a Bagger Vance and befriend the person in charge in order to change their mind. Janine (Quinta Brunson) says that’s a stupid idea, but Gregory (Tyler James Williams) points out it’s still one of Will Smith’s best movies. Barbara mixes up Will Smith with Will Ferrell and Tyriq tries to get the meeting back on track. Unfortunately, for him, Janine says that Wild Wild West is Will Smith’s best movie. Barbara agrees and brings up that the movie’s theme song is so good it has its own line dance. Gregory didn’t know about the line dance and Barbara decides that showing is better than telling. Tariq bought a gavel just for the meetings, but he has never actually used it because most Philly group functions end in a group line dance to “Wild Wild West” by Will Smith. We cut away and all the parents and teachers are in fact doing a line dance to “Wild Wild West.”

 

The next day Jacob (Chris Perfetti) is trying to teach his students about the US Constitution and the Draconian Constitution from ancient Greece. While he’s explaining that the Draconian Constitution was overly harsh and included one-size-fits-all punishments he notices that Brandon (Dax Rey), one of his students, is scratching a lot. When Jacob asks him to show him his arm, Jacob doesn’t like what he sees.

 

We cut away and Janine and Gregory are making movie night plans. Jacob asks if he can tag along, but it’s a couple thing. Then, he mentions to Janine, Gregory and the rest of the teacher’s lounge that one of his students has ringworm. Gregory doesn’t stick around for further explanation and leaves. Mr. Johnson (William Stanford Davis) says whoever is in charge of sanitizing the school ought to be fired and the rest of the teachers are panicked. The nurse is out, so Jacob sent Brandon home and sanitized.  However, Brandon could’ve touched other students and some of Jacob’s 8th graders have younger siblings. You can keep middle schoolers from touching, but Melissa (Lisa Ann Walter), Janine and even Ava (Janelle James) agree that little kids are a different story. In years past, ringworm outbreaks have shut Abbott down, so the teachers want to try and contain it.

 

Plus, Melissa has a date with a guy with an inground hot tub and hot tubs and fungal infections don’t mix. Barbara says she had ringworm once during her second year of teaching. She states it was awful, but she’s glad she’s immune now. Melissa says there’s no such thing as immunity to ringworm, but Barbara disagrees. Janine has a plan to prevent the spread of ringworm. Long story short, they’re going to isolate the younger kids from the rest of the school to keep the kids from touching each other. Elsewhere, Gregory is freaking out and obsessively cleaning his classroom. When Janine comes by to see him, he makes it clear that he has a thing about fungal infections: he hates them.

 

Janine points out that since he teaches first graders so he’s around a lot of germs, but for Gregory a cold is different than ringworm. She leaves him cleaning and says his being freaked out by fungus is pretty on-brand for Gregory. On an unrelated note, we see Brandon again. Why? His mother sent him back to school despite the ringworm. It gets worse. Brandon left his video game at school and let some of his friends play with it throughout the day. This makes Melissa and Jacob panic, but what does it mean for the plan?

 

Melissa goes to share the news with Janine and tells her they need to expedite the plan. Janine says she has been preparing for this her entire life. Melissa goes to tell Ava, but of course Ava is way ahead of her because listening in on their classroom conversations is a thing that she does.

 

In accordance with the plan, Mr. Johnson is in charge of guarding the staircase leading up to the middle schoolers. The older kids can be trusted to keep their distance, Janine says, but the little kids are a different story. Also, no group activities, no recess, no gym, no visits to the library and no bathroom breaks. Gregory is rocking in the fetal position and Jacob thinks this might all be a little excessive, but Ava says this will protect the entire school.

 

When Janine checks in on Gregory again, he’s gloved up and doesn’t have any skin visible. Janine points out that they sealed off the second floor, so he doesn’t have to go the extra mile in his own classroom. However, Gregory isn’t touching anyone or leaving his classroom until the ringworm threat is gone. Janine is disappointed when Gregory no longer wants to do their double feature on account of the ringworm. Later, Gregory tells the cameras that he’s not crazy, but that he’s just pragmatic.

 

Fun fact about the layout of the school – the teacher’s lounge is on the second floor. Barbara needed coffee, so she bribed Mr. Johnson with a fruit strip. Melissa, with her hot tub date in mind, isn’t too happy about this. Barbara points out that she’s made it through several outbreaks without getting ringworm herself and she expects that trend to continue. Furthermore, she says she’s immune because God protects her. Melissa wonders why God would protect only her and not the kids. Melissa is glad Barbara is so strong in her faith, but she wants to protect her weekend plans, so she asks Barbara to stay on the first floor.

 

On the second floor we see Jacob teaching wrapping up a lesson on the Constitution until the bell rings. However, he doesn’t let the kids leave because recess has been canceled and his students aren’t happy about it. Ideologically speaking, Jacob doesn’t approve of the lockdown, but his hands are tied. Ava, wearing a hazmat suit, pitches a story about saving the school from a ringworm outbreak to The Atlantic and turns away a kid covered in glitter from the principal’s office. This leads to her announcing that there’s no sending students to the principal’s office for the rest of the day and wishes the kids a happy Purge Day.

 

Back on the second floor a student Tyree (Jonigan Booth) convinces Jacob to let him use the bathroom by accusing him of being Draconian. On the first floor Gregory is giving his very confused students a crash course in fungal infections. Then, Gregory notices his student Gio (Baldwin James Farrior) wearing a hoodie he wasn’t previously wearing. Gio explains his older brother brought the hoodie from the second floor. We cut away and Ava announces that Abbott is now in complete lockdown and she’s reviewing the tapes to see which teacher is to blame.

 

News spreads and all the teachers share their exposure stories. Gregory talks about the infected hoodie, Jacob reveals his student dapped up Barbara and went to the library and Melissa is angry because she shaved her legs. Gregory is freaking out even more and wants Abbott shutdown and Ava being Ava heads to her bunker.

 

When Jacob gets back to his class Brandon is sequestering himself in the corner. Jacob tells him he doesn’t have to punish himself, but Brandon says he just doesn’t want to give anyone else ringworm. Jacob tells the cameras that Brandon has the right idea, they should all be looking out for each other. Then, he tells the rest of the teachers they should put all the exposed kids in the gym for the rest of the day. Since one of his kids was patient zero, Jacob volunteers to watch the infected kids.

 

Melissa thinks she’s safe until Ava reminds her that she and Jacob are roommates. Barbara reiterates that she’s blessed, so much that God gave her a halo of her own. Ava tells her she has ringworm and Barbara says God’s plan is for her to leave and she departs. Ava thinks God wants her to go home too and heads outside.

 

As the kids leave, Gregory and Janine discuss their postponed movie night. Gregory offers to Facetime with Janine, but she looks disappointed. Gregory takes a deep breath, takes off a glove, goes after Janine and asks her which movie she wants to watch first. Sometime later Gregory says he got ringworm, and it was as awful as he imagined, but Janine says they got it together. Mr. Johnson says he always has ringworm, Barbara gave her choir ringworm, Melissa got it, and Jacob got it really bad. Although, Ava didn’t get it but did get a tapeworm.