Abbott Elementary – Willard R. Abbott

By: Atiya Irvin-Mitchell

In Melissas (Lisa Ann Walter) class it’s time for show and tell amongst the second graders. You’ve got your run of the mill presentations about the inside of eyelids from the students. But when it’s Khalil’s (Kaden Taylor) turn to present he says he brought a famous person that he met outside. At first Melissa doesn’t seem to have high expectations, but she along with everyone else is shocked when Bradley Cooper walks in. Khalil met him at the deli across the street as it seems that whenever he’s in Philly, Bradley Cooper says that he goes there because his father used to take him when he was a kid. When Khalil asked him to come over, Bradley had time to kill so he came by. Melissa texts the rest of the teachers who come over. Each of the teachers shout out their favorite Bradley Cooper performances and the kids are treated to Bradley Cooper’s Rocket Racoon voice from Guardians of the Galaxy. Janine (Quinta Bruson) liked him in He’s Just Not That into You, Barbara (Sheryl Lee Ralph) says she liked him in The Holdovers (mistaking it for The Hangover) and Jacob (Chris Perfetti) says he was a fan of West Hot American Summer. After a quick photo, though, Bradley Cooper says he has to run because he never got his hoagie.

Janine arrives late to a meeting, but when she shows up she doesn’t come alone. She introduces everyone to Joan (Jennifer Elise Cox) from the city and Elizabeth (June Diane Raphael) from the Education Board. They’re with Janine because Abbott Elementary is set to be designated as a historical landmark. Ava (Janelle James) is really excited about this, but only because historical landmark designation comes with a discretionary fund. When she makes the announcement to the kids later, they’re mostly just excited for the pizza party the district is throwing for the neighborhood.

Janine is really, really excited but she notices that Barbara isn’t as hyped. When she gets the reason out of her we find out that she is happy that Janine is excited, but this is just local politics. Barbara doesn’t think the district sincerely cares about the school and Melissa adds that historical landmarks aren’t exactly hard to come by in “The City of Brotherly Love.” This bothers Janine who feels like Melissa and Barbara like raining on her parades. Barbara firmly points out that Janine asked for their opinion. However, Janine responds that was before she knew it’d be so negative.

Later in an interview Melissa and Barbara acknowledge that sometimes meaningless accolades can be a win-win, but in the grand scheme of things they don’t change much. Janine thinks this means that Abbott Elementary can’t be overlooked anymore. At the party things get a smidge complicated. No one seems to know a lot about Willard R. Abbott, the school’s namesake, until a partygoer tells the room during Janine’s speech that he was a racist. At first Elizabeth and Joan start to say they don’t know if that’s true, but then other partygoers encourage the kids to know their history.

Long story short, Willard R. Abbott was a city planner that made moves to uphold segregation by redlining all over Philadelphia. For the unfamiliar, redlining is a discriminatory practice in which financial services are withheld from neighborhoods that have significant numbers of racial and ethnic minorities. More often than not it harms Black Americans. Jacob feels really, really bad that he didn’t know that as a history teacher. The teachers suppose it’s not shocking that a white man from his era was racist, but Melissa wonders why they didn’t do a background check. Janine worries if Joan knew about this, and it seems that she did. Fun fact for Pennsylvania natives: The state and many of its cities are named after terrible humans. Janine is upset, but Joan says the nature of history is that it’s not all good. Jacob suggests naming the school after someone who doesn’t suck, but Joan and Elizabeth have a long list of mascots and schools being re-named already. They don’t have time for damage control, and this is now too complicated, the designation might not happen. When Ava and Janine ask if they can salvage this Elizabeth explains that they can find a not-problematic Willard R. Abbott to claim as the school’s namesakes. According to MyNameStats.com Willard is the 821st most popular name in America, but in the library Jacob, Janine and Gregory discover there are actually a few Willard R. Abbotts. Unfortunately, a lot of them aren’t the greatest humans.

Jacob finds a reason to leave Janine and Gregory alone for a few minutes because he ships them. During that time they talk a bit about Janine’s idea to revamp the libraries and what she misses about Abbott. Then, Jacob returns with an idea. They’ve been focused on Willards, but what about the Bills and Willys? There is a Willy Abbott V who is Willard R. Abbott’s great-great-great grandson. He’s a philanthropist, he cares about the environment, he combats misinformation on the internet, and he wrote an op-ed on Medium denouncing his racist grandfather. They bring him to the city and district, and they think he’s squeaky clean enough to be Abbott’s new namesake.

When they meet Willy Abbot V (David Clayton Rogers) they’re excited, but nervous and ask questions to ensure there are no skeletons in the closet. He’s an Eagles fan, believes that women make great leaders and thankfully was nowhere near the capital on Jan. 6, 2020. At first, when Willy Abbott starts making his speech about environmental racism, things seem to be going well. But then he reveals himself to be a flat earther and tells the kids the earth isn’t round. To make matters worse he doesn’t believe in gravity either. This goes about as well as you can expect, and the district and city back out.

This upsets Janine who really wanted that historical designation. Melissa tries to comfort her by saying someone would’ve probably stolen the plaque anyway. Barbara and Melissa ask her why this is bothering her so much and Janine explains that she loves Abbott Elementary and wants the world to know it’s special. However, they point out that it’s not the building that makes Abbott special. Janine loves the school because it’s the teachers and students. Melissa tells Janine they don’t need a plaque to prove their worth. Barbara adds that they just teach the students the best they can with what they have and that’s what Abbott teachers have done since the school was founded. That seems to give Janine an idea, so she thanks Melissa and Barbara and she runs off.

Janine’s idea was to head to the district archives with Jacob and Gregory. What she comes up with is a piece of history that was overlooked. She and Gregory frame a very old photograph and Janine explains that 150 years ago there were no Black teachers in the city. Then in 1862 Banneker Colored School hired Philadelphia’s first Black teachers in a public school. Soon after Abbott Elementary hired the first Black teachers in the city. Janine says they didn’t know it, but they made history. So, they don’t need a plaque they have each other.