American Horror Stories – Milkmaids

By: Kelly Kearney

Hold on to your lunch because this week’s “American Horror Stories” reminds us that not all horror has to be serial killers or things that go bump in the night; sometimes they can be cringey-gross-out moments tucked in-between an 18th-century pandemic that divides a small New England town into two factions: Science believers and religious faithful. If this sounds familiar, maybe the true horror in this story is how humans–not the ones in the 18th century nor the ones in the 21st, are slow at learning lessons; even at the expense of their own lives.  

1757 Pandemic

In the 18th century modern medicine hadn’t hit its stride and in its absence religion became the cure-all, all the way to the grave. When we first meet Thomas Browne (Cody Fern), a local landowner and powerful man, he’s grieving the death of his wife Rachel and daughters from the smallpox pandemic that’s been decimating the Northeastern United States. He and his son Edward (Ian Sharkey) are the family’s only surviving members and the pain of this loss takes him to the local Pastor Walter (Seth Gabel) who, by the way, isn’t exactly the man of the cloth Thomas believes him to be. The good Pastor just came back from meeting with Celeste (Julia Schlaepfer), a former milkmaid and current sex worker who happens to be offering the townspeople more than her body for a night. Celeste believes she was blessed by Saint Lazarus and, while she too is infected with the disease, her symptoms seem dormant thanks to the (prepare to gag) liquid contents of her boils. When Pastor Walter showed up inquiring about her services he violently lashed out when he learned of her sores and this idea that they make her a healer. He was there for sex, not licking the pus from her pustules, which she claims is the cure. Luckily for Pastor Walter it seems Celeste managed to dose him with some boil juice before he took a swing at her and fled back to the rectory where Thomas in his unimaginable grief is looking for advice on how to help his son not only move on from these losses but keep him free from the disease. Edward is difficult, sullen and disobedient and his father assumes it has to do with all that he’s lost. He is determined to keep his boy safe, regardless of the kid’s attitude, and tells the pastor about a rumored cure of burning the decayed heart of a loved one to prevent the living from succumbing to the disease. These are just rumors, right? Not according to Pastor Walter who is terrified he caught smallpox from his romp with Celeste and is now open to trying anything. So desperate is he that he convinces Thomas that the only way to keep young Edward safe is to cut out his mother’s heart and feed it to him. He’s skipping right past the cooking and straight to the sushi-grade cannibalism. He thinks flesh touched by Christ (dead flesh) could cure faster than burning and,with a little cajoling, he convinces Thomas it’s true. Something tells me Walter is sicker than he thinks he is…. So, before Rachel’s funeral, the two men remove her heart and each takes a bloody bite. Later, Thomas attempts to feed some of it to Edward by mixing it in with his supper but the child winds up feeding it to their cat when his father is distracted by Milkmaid Delilah (Addison Timlin) – with whom he seem to get on with regardless of milkmaids’ evil reputations. 

The following day Pastor Walter uses Rachel Browne’s funeral sermon to tell the townspeople about this cure. Sure, it’s right in the middle of this poor heartless woman’s funeral (rude), but time is of the essence now that the streets are filling up with the dead faster than they can bury them. If you are assuming the average Puritan would shun the idea of cannibalism, you thought wrong; this is, after all, the same region of the Northeast where burning “uppity” women at the stake was considered to be a celebrated pasttime. The parishioners, mostly poor and uneducated, rely on the local clergyman to guide them towards hope. So, it is no surprise that they quickly latch on to this grotesque idea. Within a day the entire village starts digging up their loved ones and removing their hearts – some eating the flesh and others burning them. Pastor Walter assumes the heart of Thomas’ wife is what kept him from catching smallpox from Celeste, not realizing it was Celeste who actually inoculated him. Walter is led by his ignorance and judgemental misogyny, so it is no wonder it leads the town down this dark path.

History Meets Horror Stories 

Medical historians can vaguely trace the smallpox cure back to an 18th-century English doctor named Edward Jenner. Jenner documented a similarity between milkmaids who were once infected with cowpox and later had some sort of immunity to smallpox. He tested his theory by inoculating a patient with the pus from a cowpox sore and then exposing the same patient to smallpox repeatedly. The patient never contracted the disease and vaccination was born! Smallpox began its slow decline from epidemic to endemic with Doctor Jenner’s discovery influencing medicine’s early work in epidemiology. 

While the townspeople are eating their family members we go back to Delilah, who like all milkmaids is an outcast in her highly religious environment. The self-educated woman finds solace in books and learning – not to mention her feminist need to better herself without the guidance of a man. She is an independent woman – something frowned upon in this patriarchal society and doesn’t buy into whatever the Pastor Walter’s of her world are selling. In fact, Delilah uncovers her own cure for the town’s rampant disease (much like real-life Doctor Jenner) when she comes upon an injured Celeste attempting to flee the town. Celeste made the mistake of outing Walter as a hypocrite when she tried stopping his faithful devotees from cannibalizing the dead. She interrupted his sermon and begged the parishioners to recognize him as a liar. Unfortunately, for her effort she was viciously dragged out of the chapel and banished from the town under the threat of hanging. Like Celeste, it seems Delilah isn’t exactly loved by the townspeople and manages to find a soulmate in her fellow outcast. She invites Celeste to stay so she can bandage her wounds from the dragging, and over time the two women grow fond of each other with that fondness turning to love. One night, when tensions are hot and the two women fall into each other’s arms, Delilah learns of Celeste’s infection. Instead of shunning her, she embraces the miracle that is Delilah. She doesnt believe this is a pus-eating gift from Lazarus, but she does consume some anyway – mostly for sexual gratification. Celeste might be a woman of faith, but Deliah, who is guided by science, figures out why they never succumbed to smallpox when she notices a pox sore on her precious dairy cow. The two, “opposites attract” both came down with cowpox in the past and now Delilah is thinking the illnesses are linked. They might’ve built up an immunity! If they can get the townspeople to drink milk from an infected cow or milk Celeste’s boils directly into their drinks the milkmaids can be the saviors that Pastor Walter thinks he is! Of course, the pious people of town refuse to heed the advice of a milkmaid who they already assume to be evil witches and not caring farm girls with a mind for science. When Delilah is caught delivering the infected milk, the men of the town (who would rather feed on their dead loved ones than listen to a woman) chooses to kill her rather than trust she knows what she’s talking about.

Ignorance Leads to Contagion and Death

With Delilah dead and the townspeople right behind her, we learn a secret has been kept about Edward’s biological make-up. Thomas had an affair with Celeste and was so embarrassed by her ranking in society and her sore-covered skin, he lied about who birthed Edward. He died wondering if this pandemic was God’s punishment for his infidelity and dishonesty. Edward, the creepy little milkmaid offspring, finds this truth out when Celeste comes to him amidst the town’s chaos and tells him she is his mother and came to save him. Instead of embracing the only parent he has left, Edward strikes his mother down– ripping out her heart and eating it as he rattles off Pastor Walter’s favorite parable: “Nothing is so unclean as a woman who lives with beasts.” Smallpox might have been the culprit in this town’s destruction, but ignorance and sheep mentality was the Puritan’s ultimate undoing. Well, that, and an AHS trademark evil little kid with a taste for maternal blood. Michael Langdon would be so proud!