iZombie – The Fresh Princess

By: Maggie Stankiewicz

Liv (Rose McIver) Skypes with her father Martin (Bill Wise) who, despite working towards sobriety, is still donning the terrible toupee. They disengage and Liv turns to Major (Robert Buckley) to ask him about his own journey in quitting Utopium. Major assures her that it can be done, then returns to scrolling through Instagram to monitor Sloane Mills (Laura Bilgeri). Unbeknownst to him, Dolly (Jennifer Irwin) is holding Sloane captive in a porta-potty, starving her, while curating her Instagram profile to give the illusion of happiness and freedom. Sloane isn’t Dolly’s only captive zombie, either. Sloane’s boyfriend is also being held prisoner.

A new murder victim has also surfaced in Seattle, Laurie-Beth Spano (Debbie Perovich). Laurie, a prolific beauty pageant contestant who had been in a coma for twenty-years after being poisoned, finally succumbed to death’s kiss. The woman, whose brain manifests like a living 90s-time capsule, will aid Liv in solving her murder – which involves foul play, manslaughter and a small slew of suspects. The brain takes Liv over quickly and she becomes an inspiring, yet diplomatic version of herself who reacts to everyday life as though she were on stage. 90s Teen Pageant Girl Brain entertains Clive (Malcolm Goodwin) and Ravi (Rahul Kohli) more so than the others…for now.

Clive and Ravi take to the evidence room to uncover some extra information, only to discover that a bad cop named Mosher had removed the evidence four years prior. This sends the men off on an excursion to meet with the Blue Cobras gang. Meanwhile, Liv pays a visit to Martin and finds him unconscious on the floor. When he awakens he discovers that Liv has called Major in to assist and she packs him a bag for check in to a facility. As she does so, Liv experiences a flashback that pushes her beauty contestant brain into overdrive. She heads back to the morgue, dressed totally like Elle Woods, and describes to Clive the scene that had played out in her head. Laurie had been full of anxiety and unable to get into her dressing room before stepping on stage. She then made her way to Velma (Jordan Claire Robbins), a contestant’s dressing room, and borrowed Velma’s poisoned compact.

Clive and Liv hypothesize that Velma was the intended victim of Laurie-Beth’s assailant. The sugar-high induced from Liv’s excessive Capri-Sun and Tang consumption gives her the energy needed to put together a timeline of events at said pageant. In the midst of their conversations, Laurie-Beth’s parents stop by with contest footage from the Miss Future Seattle show. They surrender the tapes and offer themselves as full cooperators in the investigation.

Peyton (Aly Michalka) and Ravi deal with their own minor investigation and pay a visit to A.J. (Tim Chiou) in prison. Ravi really puts on the bravado with which Peyton grows frustrated and speeds the conversation along – off the record. A.J. confirms that Mosher stole the evidence from the station to take over the recipe so they could continue cooking up product. A.J. proceeds to tell the duo that despite orchestrating the ordeal Mosher never delivered the vials of drugs. Instead, the vials were full of water – suggesting that someone got to Mosher before he could pull through for the gang. When they return to the station to follow up on the lead, they discover that more evidence had been signed out a by doctor who eerily resembled a fully-haired Don E (Bryce Hodgson).

Liv and Clive call Velma in for an interview, where she claims that she had been coerced into a false confession because she couldn’t afford a lawyer. Velma admits to saying poisonous things to Laurie-Beth, but that she would never actually poison her. Velma harbored envy over Laurie-Beth and her perfect life and complained to her friend Elise (Tara Erica Moore) about it. They dismiss Velma and watch some old footage of Laurie-Beth where they discover that Elise had been consistently tied with Laurie-Beth on the pageant circuit. They call Elise in for an interview where she admits to sabotaging tap shoes – but certainly not the makeup. The typical game of pointed fingers ensues and Elise reveals that Laurie-Beth had been having an affair with a gentleman in the midst of the contest.

Major decides to look for Sloane and starts at The Scratching Post. Don E says that the picture on Instagram is dated and shows Major the security camera footage. Darcy (Valerie Tian) joins the camera footage viewing where they spot evidence that Sloane was kidnapped…again. Darcy and Don E point fingers at the Dead Enders and Major storms off in a huff. Ravi follows up on Don E’s “doppelgänger,” but Don E denies impersonating a scientist and says that it was his brother Scott E who fronted that operation. Major returns to rendezvous with Don E and Darcy, who tell him that they went undercover to find Sloane’s kidnapper. The woman they cornered jumped off of a building instead of surrendering to them – and they present the woman’s body to Major – who is now left to deal with a dead human. Major takes the brain of the woman back to Fillmore Graves where he invites his soldiers to eat the woman in hopes of inciting a vision that will clue them in on the whereabouts of Sloane.

Peyton goes home to keep watch on Martin. Martin probes Peyton on her job and the humans vs zombies debacle, but Liv comes home before they can dive into too many details. Liv commends her father on his dedication to recovering and enjoys a few tender moments with Liv. Martin watches as Liv and Peyton embrace and maybe, just for a moment, he softens to the idea of zombies and humans living in harmony. The following day, Eva (Molly Hagan) shows up on her doorstep with Evan (Nick Purcha), who needs safe passage out of the city in order to get a fighting chance against his recurring cancer. Liv says that smuggling him out the city will be difficult, but she could scratch him. Liv’s mom opposes this suggestion and Martin steps out of the shadows to side with Liv. Martin and Eva begin fighting without skipping a beat, but promises to help. This is when Evan steps back into the room and meets his father for the first time. Martin tries to tempt him into being scratched, but Liv fights for Evan’s autonomy. It’s up to her brother to decide and she will help him either way.

Ravi and Peyton are at it again, breaking and entering to find the evidence that Scott E had stolen. Just as they’re about to make a break in the case they spot Blaine (David Anders) sitting in the dark waiting for them. Blaine questions their presence in the basement and encourages Peyton to make a deal with him: he’ll provide access to the evidence and information in exchange for the release of his impounded vehicles and a handicap parking placard. Blaine points them in the right direction and Ravi finds that even those vials are empty. Peyton calls Liv to fill her in on Blaine’s shenanigans, but their girl-talk is interrupted by Martin knocking on Liv’s bedroom door. He tells her that he thinks he’s detoxed enough to go home on his own. Martin commends Liv on her brilliance, but expresses his concern over humans ever fully accepting zombies. They have a moment and Martin takes full advantage. He asks her that if there ever comes a day where she must choose between humanity and zombies that she let him take care of her. She does not believe such a day will come.

Ravi is downtrodden, saddened at his and Peyton’s inability to locate the tainted Utopium that started it all. Peyton isn’t quite so sad yet and thinks she can locate Beanpole Bob. Peyton is willing to keep fighting and Ravi loves her for it, but…she’s been keeping a secret from him. She sent in her resignation the day prior, which is bad for her career, but great because she no longer has the ability to give Blaine the things she bargained with him for.

Clive has found another witness in Megan, a girl who had used Velma’s makeup the same day as Laurie-Beth. Megan didn’t suffer from any side effects, which narrows the window of poisoning. They take to the tapes once more and spot Laurie-Beth’s mom sneaking around backstage during the timeframe in which the compact was poisoned. Gayle (Wanda Cannon), Laurie-Beth’s mother will only be deemed guilty if she confesses. Clive calls Laurie Beth’s parents in under the guise of getting a testimony. Gayle witnesses Velma being interrogated and crumbles from the guilt of watching Velma get accused once more. Then, she confesses and the admission of guilt seems to make her a little freer. Liv enters the room with Clive and Velma to commend her on her acting skills. Criminal put away in prison, Liv rejoins her mother and brother for their goodbyes – she’s found safe passage for Evan and Eva out of the city.

Dolly is up to no good. What else is new? At one of the city’s major pie events, Dolly sits at her pie stand and casts a glance over to a row of portable restrooms, ones that closely resemble the porta potties she was starving her zombie prisoners in. Children play amongst themselves, all around the makeshift zombie cells. Dolly confirms that the plan is ready to execute and approaches the line of stalls – cutting the tape that once held them shut. They rumble and rattle until a small horde of starved zombies are set free on the unknowing citizens of New Seattle. Fillmore Graves are nearby, but they’re not close enough to stop the chaos before Dolly films the calamity of her own design. The damages keep coming. Ravi and Peyton have finally traced back the tainted Utopium and are sitting outside of the responsible party’s home. As they’re preparing to confront the Father of all Zombiekind they watch as Liv and Martin step out of his home. Worlds collide.