Powerless – I’ma Friend You

By: Jay Smith

“See, I like having a friend who can tell me that.” “And I like having a friend who would probably notice if I was dead in my apartment.” “Well, what about your kid?” “She has an iPad.”- exchange between Emily and Jackie

The team is watching a press conference of Crimson Fox (Deanna Russo) telling the town she’ll be leaving to go to another town close to Metropolis. Emily (Vanessa Hudgens) is upset and questions what would happen if the Joker attacks in her absence and Van (Alan Tudyk) tells her Joker is A-List and the town couldn’t even get a WNBA team to come. Teddy (Danny Pudi) and Ron (Ron Funches) throw out suggestions on her replacement naming Aqualad as one. Teddy then makes a sidekick joke comparing Aqualad to a cheese plate. Emily, Jackie (Christina Kirk) and Wendy (Jennie Pierson) are concerned about their safety especially now with weirdo Tony getting bolder with his harassment to them. After the girls imitate Tony’s inappropriate phrase Teddy offers protection hoping someone would disagree but they don’t. Van is over the conversation and tells the girls to “grow a pair,” but a bee being in his office, scaring him and asking Jackie for help forces the advice to fall flat.

Emily mentions taking self defense classes and invites Jackie but of course she doesn’t want to or can’t go because of her kid and Van, but the thought of punching a stranger, after Van keeps calling for her help, makes her change her mind. Jackie finally arrives in Van’s office to reassure him that the bee didn’t lay eggs in his hair. He tells her something more important has happened and to gather the floor. In the meeting Van is upset that someone used his bathroom. He tells them justice will be swift and fair (while mentioning a firing) before asking the culprit to come forward. No one says anything and then Van starts picking on Dorothy, with terrible poop jokes, until he gives up momentarily. Emily is looking for Jackie when she tries to explain the horribly executed shirts to Teddy. Van walks by and mispronounces the shirt calling it inappropriate, but thanking her for the honesty. Emily tries to play it off that her and Jackie are closer than they really are and Teddy doesn’t believe her. She leaves to go to class and when she returns she looks a mess. Teddy sees her and asks about the class, but Emily tells him Jackie didn’t show up and she jumped into a trash bin to avoid a Jack O’Lantern attack. Tony (Michael Cornacchia) decides to be gross despite Emily’s appearance and both she and Teddy tell him to cool it, even though Teddy is eating a hot dog secretly while telling Tony off. Emily is upset and Teddy tries to make an excuse until he sees Jackie and signals her location to Emily. Furious, Emily runs up and into the car, scaring Jackie and asks for an explanation. Jackie can’t get over the garbage smell, but wants to talk later. Emily doesn’t but before they can continue the conversation a passenger gets in the van and Jackie has to tell Emily she’s Ubering for extra cash.

Jackie is waiting for Emily, who immediately starts talking, but stops once Jackie twists her arm and pushes her into a quiet corner so they can talk. Jackie tells Emily that her kid, Ruby, has a field trip to Six Flags and money is tight hence the side job. She doesn’t want the office to know. Emily mentions concern for her driving strangers and Jackie twists her arm again so she’ll stop mentioning Ubering. Emily asks if she has brothers and probes for more information but Jackie doesn’t want them to bond anymore. Jackie twists Emily’s arm one last time and tells her not to “Emily” the situation. In the break room she mentions to the group about helping someone until she gets tripped up by Teddy and admits it’s for Jackie. She reiterates the field trip story and after a few jokes at Teddy’s expense for trying to make his name a verb Van walks in and asks for Ron, Wendy and Teddy. While giving them nicknames, he accuses one of three being the culprit and Ron laughs at him using “logs.” He calls for Peter (Greg Romero Wilson) the janitor, whom he disrespects by calling him Pedro, and asks for his findings. Before completing embarrassing Van, Peter shows the group a magazine that was left behind. Again no one confess and the threatens them with their new workspace in conference room b. He shows them the room and tries to make it seem uncomfortable but they adjust to the room easily.

Emily arrives at Ruby’s school and after a semi awkward exchange she gives the field trip check to Ms. Fry (Carla Renata). Confused, Ms. Fry asks what trip and Emily mentions Six Flags. Ruby (Willa Piel Pogue) and the other kids overhear and they get extremely excited. Ms. Fry has to break the news that there isn’t a Six Flags trip and the type of trips they normally take are sad ones. Back in the office, Emily suggests they drop the situation and don’t mention it to Jackie but then Ruby and Jackie walk in and a sad Ruby tells Jackie what happened. Emily tries to play it off, but Jackie isn’t pleased and walks away with Ruby. Van interrogates Teddy, Wendy and Ron individually while bribing them with a furniture store for card to turn on each other. Emily tries to make peace with Jackie by bringing her coffee, but it fails since she has her own. Emily tries again to extend the friend card to Jackie in the elevator and her car. Jackie tells her there isn’t a friendship blossoming because they work together, that’s it. She pulls away and then we see Jack O’Lantern attacking the city with fireballs when one hits Jackie’s van.

Jackie has minor injuries and the doctor tells her they’ve contacted her emergency contact. Confused at first then remembers who she put down, Emily walks in with flowers and excited for the honor. Jackie tells her she put her down because she’s reliable. Emily apologizes for overstepping and Jackie apologizes for the amount of steps people have to take in order to get to know her. Jackie finally opens up that the money is for night classes to get her MBA. She doesn’t tell people her business because she doesn’t like attention. Jackie admits a friendship with Emily wouldn’t be too bad, but Emily needs to calm down so people will want to be her friend. Jackie allows a quick hug and tells Emily to turn her happy song off before the girls finally leave the hospital. Wendy is inquiring about furniture when Teddy calls her a traitor. The two own up to why the would never use Van’s bathroom and Ron breaks up the tiff to remind them that they’re all friends. All three march into Van’s office and tell him they all did it to show solidarity amongst themselves. Van gets a message and it’s the surveillance footage to see who did it. They watch the tape and it shows him cowering with the bee in the room and the magazine Jackie used to kill the bee that was left behind. Trying to save face, Van says he knew no one did it and the situation was a lesson in friendship. Jackie and Emily are coming back from self defense class with the matching shirts. Jackie is only wearing her because she got the instructor’s blood on her original shirt. Tony sees them and starts to be inappropriate, but Jackie shows some moves from class and they tell him to stop the harassment. He agrees, while in pain, and the girls high five each other and continue to walk down the street. Ron and Teddy have seen the whole thing, while eating hotdogs, and are sad it’ll be there last one. Teddy says it’s hard to divorce the artist from his work. We see today’s surveillance footage and everyone has used Van’s bathroom. Peter deletes the footage, while saying his correct name, and uses the bathroom proving he was and is always the last one to use it.