Scorpion – Ice Ca-Cabes

By: Kim Olson

Everything is back to normal. Scorpion is back to the original roster and they have a case to handle. While prepping for the mission of the week, the geniuses are inspired to make a curling pond and play against each other – Toby (Eddie Kaye Thomas) and Walter (Elyes Gabel) versus Happy (Jadyn Wong) and Sylvester (Ari Stidham). While playing, they discuss how the loss of Tim (Scott Porter) in the last episode isn’t much of a loss at all. Walter informs his team, “Everyone on Scorpion is replaceable. There are other top mathematicians, behaviorists and engineers. We could find a younger and stronger federal agent. And truth be told, there are three people with higher IQs than mine, four including Ralph. So, my point is that we are all substitutable parts of a machine.” Suddenly, everyone on team Scorpion wonders if their job is in jeopardy. And not a moment too soon as Paige (Katharine McPhee) returns from seeing Tim off at the airport and Scorpion heads to the middle of the desert for their job of the day.

While at the job site, a turbine the team is inspecting explodes! Due to the velocity and friction, a shard of copper snaps off! The small piece of shrapnel slices through Cabe’s abdominal aorta, causing him to fall to the ground bleeding out. The team is, of course, freaking out. Cabe (Robert Patrick) is like a dad to everyone on team Scorpion and they are all his children, even if their biological parents are still alive. Just earlier that day, Cabe presented Happy with his mom’s gorgeous golden brooch encrusted with rubies and diamonds, which his mom wore on her wedding day. He figured Happy could wear it on her wedding day as a part of that “something old, new, borrowed, blue” tradition. She loved it. He did such a fatherly act, probably the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for her, just to thank her for letting him stay with her while he had some work done on his home. Cabe is the best dad anyone on this team of orphans and neglected has ever had.

Cabe is dying. His mouth and entire face are turning blue. If Toby doesn’t immediately find the bleed and stop it, Cabe will die in seconds. So, Toby gets “a little personal and a lot of gross” with Cabe and sticks his fingers inside his wound. It may hurt Cabe and may not be sterile, but Toby has to wear Cabe on his hand like a puppet in order to find the bleed and remove the shrapnel. Cabe pleads to Walter to do what he does best and help him so the team of geniuses devises a plan to save him. In order for Cabe to live, they have to kill him. Happy and Toby are going to freeze him, make a “Cabescle,” so his heart stops beating and flowing blood out his torn aorta long enough for Toby to patch or glue it back up. Toby is less than confident he can do it though. The last time he did vascular surgery was on a cadaver in medical school. So, Cabe gives him one last pep talk telling him, “Doc, you can do it.” Toby comes back swinging saying, “You’re damn right I can.” Walking down memory lane he assures Cabe, “You were in my corner when you taught me how to box. I’m gonna be in your corner now.” Then, after mending Cabe’s wound, they’ll use snake venom from a rattlesnake Sylvester catches to thin Cabe’s blood. If Cabe unfreezes and there’s a blood clot in this heart it’ll kill him. Sly assures the team, “For Cabe, I will catch one with my bare hands.” But he still asks to borrow Happy’s pliers to pick up the snake. Finally, after warming Cabe up and thinning his blood, they will wake him back up by injecting his lungs with hydrogen sulfide Walter and Paige will retrieve from a nearby hot springs. There is a five percent chance Cabe lives through all of this. If it doesn’t work, Cabe dies. It’s a long shot, but as Toby the gambler informs them, “Sometimes a long shot is all you have to bet on.” Before Toby freezes Cabe, they all say goodbye to their dad. Happy reminds him they still have to finish their game of Stratego, Paige begs him to not leave her alone as the only normal on a team of geniuses, emotionless Walter tells Cabe it’s been a pleasure working with him and Toby promises Cabe he’s going to do everything in his ability to bring Cabe back – that he won’t let him down. Cabe assures Toby that if he can’t bring him back to life, it’s not his fault. He does his best to ensure Toby won’t blame himself if he dies at his hands because he knows Toby would. Before freezing to death, Cabe says one last thing – “I trust you kids.” If Cabe dies, his last words will have been “I trust you kids.”

In order to freeze Cabe to death, Happy needs the engine of her truck up and running. But she doesn’t think it can handle the heat of the desert. When it doesn’t and dies, she and Toby start bickering like an old married couple. Toby screams, “What the hell, Happy?!” Happy yells back, “What do you think I’m about to do?! I’m working on it! …I’m working on it!” He even yells positives at her like, “You can fix anything!” Toby believes in Happy, but if Cabe dies because of a decision they made together, where the fault lies mostly on her…Not good. Eventually though, they have a “Cabescle.” They have frozen Cabe to death. With Cabe frozen, they can now glue up his torn aorta, which has stopped gushing blood. Seeing Toby with his hand inside Cabe, Happy looks like she’s going to puke! “That’s so gross,” she says. Too bad for her, Toby can’t hold Cabe’s aorta closed and apply the glue at same time. Happy isn’t a fan of blood, at all, but because she’s even less keen on her friends dying she sticks her paw in the federal agent and applies the glue while Toby holds the aorta together. “It’s just like putting your hand inside of a pumpkin, but instead of a pumpkin your hand’s inside Cabe’s body cavity,” Toby assures her. After, Toby says, “I’d fist bump you, but our hands are covered in guts.” Instead, he kisses her on the forehead and says, “I’m really proud of you.”

While driving to the hot springs, Walter and Paige have a fight in the car. She tells him, “Toby has a shot at saving a man who’s bleeding to death in the middle of the desert, but I don’t know if there’s a cure for what you have. For all I know you’re suffering an intense inner turmoil over Cabe potentially dying or you truly feel nothing. I want to help you Walter, but I don’t know if you can be helped and that makes me so sad.” Walter is so confused as to why Paige is acting so cold toward him, but if she weren’t pissed off at him it’d be even more questionable. Her boyfriend just left to take a job in the Middle East and it’s all Walter’s fault. Of course, there is going to be tension between them and not the sexy kind of tension either. To make matters even more awkward, the springs they pull up to are “nudists only.” Paige is initially so nervous, but to save Cabe’s life she just starts stripping and tells Walter, “get nude genius boy!”

After patching Cabe up and injecting him with a dose of “vitamin rattlesnake” provided by the bite of the “Diamondback bastard” Sylvester caught, it’s time to warm Cabe up. As Walter and Paige drive back with a “tank full of stinky gas,” the rest of the team cooks Cabe by an open flame. “Mesquite will strengthen the flame,” Happy says. “And give Cabe a nice smoky flavor,” Toby adds. Once Walter and Paige are back with the strong gas, they pass it into Cabe’s lungs, fully expecting him to wake up. But don’t celebrate too soon because nothing happens. He’s unresponsive. Cabe is dead. Everyone pleads for Cabe to wake up. Toby begs, “Come on Cabe, you gotta come back!” Paige prays, “Please don’t let this happen.” Happy yells at Cabe, “You’re gonna leave me after we become friends?! …I swear to God, if you die, I will not wear that pin just to piss you off!” Their only chance of getting Cabe’s heart going again is the application of an electrical current. So, in the water they froze Cabe in the guys drown Cabe while Happy throws the toaster, or fan, in the bathtub with him to electrocute him back to life. Cabe comes back! Yay! His first words: “Oh man, heaven’s full of nerds.”

Soon after, the helicopter arrives to transport Cabe to the hospital. The medical personnel (Lisa Catara) tell Walter, due to liability, only family can fly along in the helicopter. Walter informs her matter-of-factly, “I am family. He’s my father.” Walter gets in the helicopter and they fly to the hospital where father and son tell each other they love each other. “We could find another federal agent, but we couldn’t find another Cabe Gallo…. I love you, Cabe. I love you,” Walter says. Cabe tells him, “I love you too, son.”

Best Lines:

• Happy (to Cabe): Isn’t that the cutie that’s hot for your booty? Oh man, I’m starting to sound like Toby.
• Toby (to Happy): Turbine’s hot, so are you by the way.
• Happy: These boots were made for walking, not pumping. Toby: A joke from Happy in a tense situation? You must be really scared. Happy: You’re not? Toby: I’m scared to death, Cabe’s death.
• Sly: You’re a rattlesnake! Use your rattle!
• Paige (while naked): That dude’s trying to get a peek at my… bubbles.
• Toby: Holy skinny-dips! You went to a nudist spring! You two saw each other’s parts! Paige: It was very professional. Happy: And naked.
• Cabe: I had to die for an hour to finally get some peace and quiet from you guys.