Speechless – C-H– CHEATER!

By: Taylor Gates

Kenneth (Cedric Yarbrough) is upset the DiMeos missed his jazz brunch. Although they wouldn’t have wanted to go anyway, this spurs them into action, and they decide to have a mail purge: checking the voicemail, snail mail, and email that has accumulated since their last round of binge-reading and listening. They find out JJ’s (Micah Fowler) history teacher has left dozens of messages, and Maya (Minnie Driver) decides to call him back first.

Maya dresses to impress for her first meeting about JJ at a mainstream school. Ray (Mason Cook) is also preparing for the day, excited about the career fair. He wants to figure out the job that’s going to make him a millionaire, dissing all the booths he deems below him, including Jimmy’s (John Ross Bowie) airport position. All the other kids are also unimpressed until Jimmy starts handing out free, unclaimed luggage. Dylan (Kyla Kenedy) takes one with international stickers and spies some odd-looking outfits inside. She decides to rock the clothes anyway.

A booth with flashy dollar sign banners catches Ray’s eye. The woman behind it, Yasmin (Nicola Lambo), tells Ray about a chance for him to become an entrepreneur by selling high-end statement jewelry. Yasmin informs Ray that sellers can make an infinite salary, and Ray is immediately sold on the idea.

A few popular girls come up to Dylan while she’s eating lunch. They tell her the top she’s wearing is ratchet, but she’s not at all fazed. Throughout the week, the whole school starts copying her style, which annoys Dylan. She finally gets sick of it, standing on the lunch table to make a speech about how not caring about what people think is what makes her cool. However, when everyone starts admitting things they’ve always wanted to wear, Dylan realizes they all have horrible taste and makes a new plan: they will all wear whatever she commands them to.

JJ’s conflict-hating teacher Mr. Powers (Jonathan Slavin) tells Maya that JJ has been obviously cheating. Maya challenges him, daring him to make JJ take the test again to see if he could get a 92% the second time. Instead of proving Mr. Powers wrong, Maya realizes that JJ has been blatantly using Kenneth to give him all the answers. Kenneth is slightly flattered, but Maya is livid. She marches JJ home, demanding that he start doing his homework. However, it has been so long since JJ has actually done it that he doesn’t even know the password to log into the homework site. Instead, he’s just been looking up pictures of Emma Watson while on the computer.

Ray butts in, trying to sell Maya some designer jewelry. He announces that he’s become a brand ambassador for Kingsley and Kate, which frustrates Jimmy, as he knows it’s an awful pyramid scheme. Ray admits he needs to come up with $500, and Jimmy reluctantly agrees to help bail him out by hosting a trunk show for random acquaintances: Dylan’s old karate teacher, a random drunk guy from the plane, someone from jury duty. Ray’s fancy sales pitch is unsuccessful, but Jimmy’s honest speech encouraging them all to buy the jewelry because they’re desperate and it’s something to do does the trick. Instead of Ray learning his lesson, he is so impressed with Jimmy’s skills that he orders more jewelry to sell. Ray tells Jimmy selling the trashy jewelry is the only thing he’s good at, which offends him.

Maya barges into the teacher’s lounge, demanding they all stop giving JJ marks he hasn’t earned. Mr. Powers and the other teachers try defending themselves, saying they only give JJ good grades because he’s a great kid who deals with a lot, but Maya assures them he still doesn’t want preferential treatment. JJ is insulted they don’t believe in him to do well on his own, which inspires to work hard and ace the next test all on his own.

Kenneth helps JJ study using fun, Emma Watson-themed games. Maya gives JJ a pep talk before school, telling him he’s eventually going to live a great, fulfilled life that he earned himself. However, JJ still gets cold feet, being too nervous to even enter the school. Kenneth spies him sitting outside, and JJ admits that he’s nervous he’s dumb. Kenneth assures him that he’s smart and can do anything he sets his mind to.

JJ ends up getting an 81% on the test. It’s not the best, but it’s a decent grade he earned all by himself, and he’s proud of it. Kenneth also took the test for fun and is thrilled about his 98%.

Jimmy drives Ray to visit a building he designed. He tells Ray he was studying to be an architect but had to give up on his dreams in favor of an insured, better-paying job when Maya got pregnant. Jimmy tells Ray he understands ambition and has drive, but sometimes you have to make sacrifices. Ray admits that he just wants to make money in order to have options for JJ, which surprises Jimmy. Jimmy tells Maya about Ray’s questions, and Dylan overhears, also anxious to discuss what JJ’s life will look like in the future.

Thinking that JJ isn’t home, they all sit down to chat about him. Maya and Jimmy say that, realistically, JJ likely won’t ever be able to live on his own. JJ overhears this and gets upset, running to Kenneth’s house to talk.