Speechless – V-A-L– VALENTINE’S D-A– DAY

By: Taylor Gates

The DiMeo family and Kenneth (Cedric Yarbrough) go out to eat. While there, they run into Jimmy’s (John Ross Bowie) ex-roommate, Ethan (Ken Marino). However, they stopped being roommates when Jimmy stole his then-fiancee, Maya (Minnie Driver), on Valentine’s Day. The kids find this story incredibly juicy, especially when it comes out that Jimmy punched Ethan in a fit of love and passion for Maya. They all have trouble picturing this as Maya and Jimmy don’t bring the heat like that anymore.

The next day at school, JJ (Micah Fowler) volunteers to deliver all the school’s candy grams. Ray (Mason Cook) tells Kenneth this was a bad idea—JJ is a candy addict who can’t be tempted around all that sugar. Ray passes off the candy grams as dumb…until he gets one and promptly proclaims that love is real. Dylan (Kyla Kenedy) steals the list and interrogates the girl (Lauryn Speights) who sent Ray the gift. It turns out, she accidentally mixed up the person she wanted to send it to.

That night, Maya expresses her concerns to Jimmy about their lack of intimacy. Jimmy isn’t the least bit worried—they have a new kind of chemistry and relationship now. Maya can’t help but think of the high divorce rate for parents of special needs children. Dylan bursts in without knocking, needing Jimmy’s help to fix the computer settings so she can catfish Ray. The fact that Dylan wasn’t at all worried she would catch the two of them in a compromising position is the last straw for Maya. She tells Jimmy they are going to celebrate Valentine’s Day the right way this year. They shake hands and Ray barges in, disgusted they are touching at all.

Dylan convinces Ray to get on his phone and check for messages from his secret admirer. Dylan impersonates a girl named Fiona (Emma Kidd)—someone who looks like Emma Watson and has been banned from her school dances because she moves too passionately. Ray invites her to his dance instead, telling her she doesn’t have to wear anything specific since she’s perfect the way she is. She, however, insists that Ray wear platform heels, a cape and an old-fashioned hat. He also learns to belly dance for her. He is so deliriously happy that he does the dishes for Dylan, making her feel a little guilty about deceiving him.

The next morning, Jimmy gives Maya breakfast in bed along with a shower of rose petals, each with a reason he loves her written on them. It’s just a preview for the real Valentine’s Day gift. Maya is even more concerned when she finds the family slideshow video he made for her. She realizes she can’t remember anything about the night Jimmy said he loved her, but there’s someone who might.

Maya begs Ethan to let her pick his memory, but he is still salty about that night and unwilling to help her. Maya is convinced Ethan still has feelings for her, even more so when his wife (Kelly King) shows up, practically looking like her clone. With that plan a bust and Jimmy continuing to do nice things for her, Maya figures there’s only one thing left to do: blow up Valentine’s Day. She charges into Dr. Miller’s (Marin Hinkle) office, demanding that she pretend she needs her and Jimmy have to chaperone the dance that night.

The next day at school, JJ devours the rest of the chocolates he’s supposed to pass out. Kenneth is furious as this wasn’t just candy: he destroyed tokens of love that people trusted him with. Kenneth makes JJ charm seventeen people so he can receive seventeen candy grams to replace the ones he ate. They pass them out at the dance, but when JJ mentions there’s a coconut-filled one in every box Kenneth gets personally tempted. JJ convinces him to go out back and snack on them and they end up eating every box.

Dylan poses as Fiona to tell Ray that she is moving. Her flight is later that night and she will be unable to go to the dance with him. Ray gets upset and cries into a pillow, causing Dylan to come clean about orchestrating the whole thing as a prank. Ray is devastated, saying he will never love again. At the dance, Dylan tells Ray to look on the bright side since now he has experience and knows how to get and treat a girl. He takes an interest in Veronica (Anjini Taneja Azhar) and makes his move. Despite the fact that Veronica isn’t interested or looking for a relationship, Dylan threatens and pressures her into dancing with Ray.

Jimmy is annoyed at Dr. Miller for making him and Maya chaperone, but he quickly realizes Maya set the whole thing up as an excuse. Maya admits that she couldn’t pull off what she wanted to therefore she had to destroy everything. Jimmy says the only gift he wants is for Maya not to question their relationship.

Ethan unexpectedly shows up at the dance, saying his wife wanted him to close this chapter of his life. He tells her everything she wants to know: the name of the bar, what she was eating and he even gives her a CD of the song that was playing. Maya goes to give the DJ the song and Jimmy spies Ethan kissing his wife. He mistakes his wife for Maya and punches Ethan in the face. Maya and Jimmy are thrilled they finally got their heat back and gleefully run from Ethan out of the dance together. The DiMeos end the night by watching the home video Jimmy made for Maya.