What We Do in the Shadows – Pride Parade

By: Gladys Luna

The vampires’ dearest neighbor Sean (Anthony Atamanuik) informs them that he has decided to run for the Staten Island Comptroller. Unfortunately for him, the demographics are not all in his favor when he realizes that the only ones that he does not have a grasp of is the LGBTQ+ Community. So, as a good contender, he finds a unique solution to put an end to this…Since he believes that the vampire gang is part of this community, he makes the choice to pay a visit to them and ask for their assistance. Sean and his wife Charmaine (Marissa Jaret Winokur) end up inside the mansion explaining his plans for his soon to begin campaign. The vampires do not exactly understand what he is running for, but they decide to support him nonetheless. Although it is fair to say that they assume he is looking for a way to take over the world, something that makes it much more interesting to them. Sean lets them know that he would like to throw a Pride parade, so he is looking for their opinion about what type of t-shirt to give to the attendees during this event. Laszlo (Matt Berry) believes that what Sean is asking for is for them to be his marshals, so he happily takes the matter into his own hands by offering his yard to build the float for the parade.

Meanwhile, the dispute between Dolly (Natasia Demetriou) and Nadja (Natasia Demetriou) continues as the toy still hasn’t forgiven the vampire for crushing her lower body and complains about not having had the chance to experience carnal desire while still alive (let’s recall that Nadja has mentioned that she died a virgin and since her spirit inhabits the doll, now she seems to be craving for that experience). In an attempt to fix this problem between them they seek for The Guide’s (Kristen Schaal) help. Nadja is willing to do whatever it takes to fall into Dolly’s good grace again, so The Guide, who has also been trying on her own to be as useful as possible, comes up with a suggestion that sheds some light over this matter and might help to finally fix this for once. She suggests that maybe if they swap spirits Dolly could be able to experience what she passionately desires. Nadja does not seem to be so convinced about this method, but she agrees. The two of them make sure Nandor (Kayvan Novak), Laszlo and Colin Robinson (Mark Proksch) are aware of their current situation, but they don’t seem to care at all about it.

Dolly, now in Nadja’s body, decides to visit some bars in town as a way to satisfy her deepest desires but given her strange behavior and brutal honesty about her real identity she is miserably sent back to square one. She even attempts to experience speed dating but after going way too far with her advances she ends up being thrown out. So far, nothing seems to be working for her. Finally, Dolly reveals that she is somehow attracted to Colin Robinson and proposes for him to have sex with her, something that takes the vampire by surprise. He is somewhat worried about how this might impact his friendship with Nadja, but Dolly says that there won’t be any effect on it given they are not really friends. Convinced by her words, he tries to make a move on her but realizes that he is only interested in Dolly when she is in doll form and decides to not to go any further with her. Nadja takes this chance to request to swap their bodies back, but Dolly completely refuses to do it and runs away. Nadja asks for The Guide’s help, but she claims she does not have the power to force a spirit out of her vessel making Nadja question why she wasn’t informed about this in the first place. Colin Robinson comes up with the idea that maybe if The Guide is able to put two spirits into the same vessel, he will offer himself up and try to convince Dolly to get out of Nadja’s body. However, as soon as this is put in motion the situation turns into a whole mess.

Meanwhile, Nandor is still a little confused and suspicious about Guillermo’s (Harvey Guillén) current behavior as he continues to avoid him at all costs. He sees his familiar has started to spend more time with Laszlo and this creates some type of jealousy within him. He believes that the other vampire envies Guillermo’s loyalty to him and that is why he is trying to steal him away, but if we know our favorite “relentless” vampire well we know he won’t allow this to happen that easily. Laszlo tries to come up with an excuse to justify the amount of time he is spending with Guillermo by saying he is just trying to teach him about science, but the truth is he is looking for a way to understand Guillermo’s new level of vampirism. Guillermo’s evolution until now is that he has grown wings and has developed the power of telekinesis. It seems that he is a late bloomer though. Laszlo is determined on his quest and has decided to test Guillermo’s abilities of telekinesis and his agility among other things but feels limited in his knowledge about it. this leads him to the decision to ask for the other vampires’ assistance with this alleging that he would like to learn more about vampires. Much to his surprise, Nandor offers himself to join him and Guillermo on this mostly to understand what is truly going on between them. So, the three of them go through some tests like throwing a bag of rice on the floor, as it is said that when this happens vampires are inevitably compelled to count every single grain. Guillermo spreads the bag out and, at first, it seems like nothing happened. Although, then Nandor and Laszlo end up counting together. As for Guillermo, he doesn’t feel the slightest urge to do it. Unfortunately, for them they cannot move onto the next test until they are done with this task. Another test consists in doing a triple jump. Laszlo does it without a blink and Nandor praises his ability but says that for him it is much easier to fly – which once took him to outer space.

Laszlo admits that he has learned a lot about vampires while trying to help Guillermo but there’s still one thing he would like to try. So, he sheds a UV light over Guillermo’s arms, but nothing happens – the total opposite of what would happen to him. He assumes that Guillermo must be a day walker. Taking advantage of this, he encourages Guillermo to get on a treadmill and produce as much sweat as possible. Guillermo does so and when he is done Laszlo manages to turn his sweat into sunscreen and covers himself in it to try walking out into the sun. Upon seeing that nothing happens, he decides to go to a beach and experience it just like any other human would do. Later, Nandor takes the opportunity to speak to Guillermo about his recent camaraderie with Laszlo and in a way to impress him he decides to fly to outer space again.

The moment they have been waiting for has arrived and now is time for the parade. Sean starts the show, which is followed by Laszlo’s speech whose face is as red as a tomato (he’s sunburned). The vampire calls for Nadja and Nandor to join him on stage to perform but we tune in to find Nandor is actually flying through outer space. Dolly, still in Nadja’s body make her appearance and in an attempt to battle for dominance, Colin Robinson manages to show his face through Nadja’s back – making some attendees to leave immediately. Right that moment Nandor returns from outer space hitting the stage like a meteor and Guillermo rushes to cover him with the pride flag since he is completely naked. Sean declares the beginning of the parade and they float down the street. Everyone seems to be happily dancing and having fun except for Guillermo who looks scared in the back of the float. Then, he progressively starts to smile until he lets himself to be caught up in the moment. Guillermo ends up wearing a rainbow scarf and a sign that says “Gay Guy.”