Wynonna Earp – Bury Me With My Guns On

By starrymag | June 1, 2016

By: Caitlin Walsh

 

Girls Just Want To Have Fun

 

We open on Wynonna (Melanie Scrofano) drinking, partying at the bar, flirting with guys who she pushes away when flashbacks haunt her.

Doc (Tim Rozon) steps in to rescue her from one such guy who forgets his damn manners. “She ain’t anybody’s but her own.” After puking in the bathroom, Wynonna gets real with Doc, telling him she thought she’d feel different–that the tightly coiled spring inside of her is just as tight, even though the Seven are dead. And Doc’s never been one for optimism–rainbows, puppies and true love aren’t exactly his thing. He’s a little more doom and gloom, festered anger and hard truths and he tells Wynonna as much. She’s starting to think at the end of the day, maybe it is just dark and bad. She won’t ever feel better.

Back on the revenant side of things, Bobo’s team is mowed down by Constance’s machine gun, and what else is new?

 

Wynonna shows up to work, looking red hot and ready for action. She has a smile on her face, with a renewed purpose. She’s ready to work. She’s ready to take on more revenants–get the next seven and the seven after that. That is until Dolls (Shamier Anderson) lets her know there’s an analyst waiting in the other room to interrogate her and her smile is gone, her drive dampened. She’s handling the questions with that classic Wynonna sass, until they start hitting too close to home. She gets more and more overwhelmed and the lie detector shows her heartrate is racing. She gives Dolls hell afterward, telling him he was supposed to be her friend, and instead, he just sat back and watched. In return, he tells her she’s not even a real deputy and when she asks him, so vulnerably, to just for once admit that he cares about her–he stares dead on and says nothing. When she turns to walk out, he tells her she failed the assessment and is suspended. (Dolls, I am so not your fan, right now.)

 

Time May Change Me…

 

Back at Shorty’s, Waverly (Dominique Provost-Chalkley) is upset as she watches on while Gus (Natascha Girgis) considers selling the bar and she is meeting with a man about it. Wynonna storms in upset and ends up trailing the real estate broker he’s meeting with into the bathroom, thinking he’s a revenant. But after pointing Peacemaker in his face, pushing it against his head, threatening him…she realizes he’s human and he’s wet his pants. Literally.

 

Constance (Rayisa Kondracki) finally works some magic with all of the bones back in her possession and brings at least one of her “sons” back to “life.” By that, I mean some much worse looking Voldemort, with less class and finesse.

 

Wynonna goes back home and ends up day drinking with Doc, ranting to him about Dolls and just how crap her day has been–and the sun is still high. Doc tells her she needs to blow off some steam and calm herself. In his opinion, Dolls was never much for heroics and what happened at the bar was just a case of mistaken identity. It’s okay. Except, it isn’t. Wynonna is more scared of the urge she felt to kill. She’s more scared of herself, of who she’s becoming. In typical Wynonna and Doc fashion, these types of charged conversations tend to lead to something sexier.

 

Officer Nicole Haught (Katherine Barrell) is ready to go back to work, having filled out a report of what happened to her and Sheriff Neadley (Greg Lawson) isn’t having it. Her supernatural account is sounding a little hysterical and he’s playing hardass–until she leaves the room and he takes the report out of the trash. He’s smarter than we’ve given him credit for. Outside, Nicole runs into Waverly and asks if they can talk–meaning to talk about what the hell is going on in this town. Waverly; however, thinks they’re talking about them and the whole thing gets a little…muddled. When Haught says, “I kind of only just discovered it…when I met you.” Waverly is cute and flustered saying, “You’re kind of special.”

.

 

Constance meets with Bobo (Michael Eklund) and his men at the bridge and while he may have brought her other’s son’s skill pieces as leverage, he’s not happy. He’s kept his ends of their bargain–but she hasn’t kept hers. Turns out, she can’t. She doesn’t have his lead for him, not yet, and Bobo has lost patience. Constance’s revived son pops out of the car and at one point starts making horrific raptor like noises that physically hurt my ears, but it’s not enough to scare Bobo and his men off. They burn the recovered broken skull pieces and that takes down her recovered son with it. It was a short-lived reunion and Constance is seeming smaller and smaller, no more cards left to play.

 

In what may be the only instance where it was cool to start talking about another woman in bed, Doc cuts his sexy-time with Wynonna short–his gunshot wound linking him to Constance is tingling and he can feel her. He can, more importantly, find her–and he wants Wynonna’s help. She’s less keen on going in, guns blazing, to take Constance out, knowing that killing Constance means killing Doc. It’s not a gamble she’s ready to make, even if he is. His plan has always been the same: revenge. Living isn’t the priority. Doc leaves while she turns her back, not leaving much room for discussion.

 

Back at the station, Sheriff Neadley approaches Dolls and they finally chat. Because Randy Neadley is not a stupid man, he knows something supernatural has been going on and he’s been keeping his eyes open. He might not be Black Badge, but he’s a smart man. One that Dolls isn’t giving nearly enough credit (or respect, if we’re being honest). Randy offers him some information on Bobo, and suddenly, Dolls is listening. Just a little. On a case by case basis, he’ll maybe consider working together with Randy. Maybe. They head to Shorty’s, Neadley trying to teach Dolls a thing or two about working in this town and becoming one of the people.

 

Meanwhile, Nicole is driving alongside Waverly, who has walked herself to the edge of town, upset after Nicole stormed off the day before after their horribly communicated conversation. She finally convinces her to get in the car and the conversation they have there is even worse, even if they’re on the same page. Waverly isn’t ready for all the changes happening because they are too fast and Nicole is one of them. It’s a lot for Waverly to chew on and they snap at each other, Waverly reminding her they’re not dating. It’s harsh. And then, she says the dreaded words: “…just friends.” Nicole breaks all of our hearts with her exasperated, “Yeah, sure, Waverly. Whatever you want.”

 

Regrets Collect Like Old Friends

 

Doc finds Constance by her car at the bridge and out pops Bobo and his men. Let the games begin! Luckily, Wynonna isn’t far behind, gun in hand. “Says the unarmed revenant in a coat Lady Gaga deemed ‘Maybe too much.’” At least she’s still got that sass I love so much. She’s done with speeches and done with threats–she’s ready to take out Bobo right here and right now. Until Doc pulls his gun on her, telling her he’ll shoot her. Bobo is his to deal with, and he’s not done. And Doc takes issue with Bobo–who promised him Constance. He’s not letting him go back on his word and he tries to turn the other revenants present against Bobo–before Bobo plays politics well, letting Doc take Constance. A deal is a deal. He leaves, promising Wynonna he’s got a surprise for her. Later.

 

Back at Shorty’s, Dolls and Neadley are playing casual and Gus has sold the bar. It’s done. Waverly might be upset, but Gus reminds her that she can be much more than a barmaid. It’s her turn to do whatever it is she wants, go live her life. Waverly just needs to figure out what that is. (Or, shall we say, who.) One of the revenants walks into the bar with a message for Wynonna–and Dolls ears perk up at that.

 

Doc and Wynonna bring Constance out to the barn, ready to torture her. Thanks to the Blacksmith (Lord, how I miss that woman), Doc has the means to render Constance powerless, and he’s ready to dive in. But Wynonna is none too happy with him. She had a clean shot at Bobo, a chance to settle things, and she tells Doc he’s nothing. Who isn’t he willing to make a deal with, after all? Doc tells her he doesn’t care much what a broken woman thinks of him. She punches him in the face, for good measure.

 

Constance gets a kick from it and Wynonna lets her stall with information. She fills Wynonna and Doc in on why she did what she did to Doc. As it turns out, it wasn’t personal. Not against Doc. It was revenge on Wyatt. It was an attack on the alpha–not Doc, the sidekick, the “perpetual second choice.” Even as angry as she may be at Doc, Wynonna isn’t ready to let him kill Constance–thus, killing himself. It’s because he’s her friend. At the end of the day, he means something to her. That and she has a better plan.

 

They bring Constance out to the salt fields and despite the witch’s begging and bargaining, promises to be their slave, help them take down Bobo–it’s useless. They bury her in the salt, all alone out there with no one nearby for miles and miles. Doc stays alive and the witch stays powerless and tortured. It’s a win-win kind of situation.

 

Waverly marches over to the police station, knowing Neadley is out and she can do this, finally. Cue the best damn scene in the entire series and the scene where everyone everywhere lost their collective cool. Waverly heads into Neadley’s office, closes all the blinds, closes the door–and pounces on Nicole. Our sweet Waverly says, “Point is, I’ve always wanted to do things that scare me, but…well, it’s not so easy to be brazen when the thing that you want, that scares you to death, is sitting right in front of you.” Haught replies, “I scare you.” Waverly retorts, “Yes. Yes you do. Because I don’t want to be friends. When I think about what I want to do most in this world, it’s you.”

 

They go back to the most beautiful make out scene, the most romantic, perfect scene in history and I’m a mess of emotions. Dominique Provost-Chalkley and Katherine Barrell have off the charts, undeniable chemistry, and it’s so real and fresh, my heart can’t handle it.

 

Doc offers to buy Wynonna a drink, an offering of thanks and peace, but Dolls is looking for her and she’s finally ready to answer. She stops by the office and Dolls offers his own peace offering, telling her she passed her second assessment with flying colors (wink wink). He tells her she’s a good deputy and then offers her a present–the revenant from the bar. But he has a message for her from Bobo–he doesn’t even mind dying for it. “Bobo bought Shorty’s.”

Revenants and Bobo flood Shorty’s, chaos ensues and I don’t have a good feeling about this. Do I ever?