Man With A Plan – Clean Country Living

By: Ujjyani Banerjee

Adam (Matt LeBlanc) and Lowell (Matt Cook) return from their walk and Andi (Liza Snyder) informs that her younger sister Kelly (Jessica St. Clair) has visited them. Adam is pissed, but before he can say anything Kelly arrives. It turns out she’s in town for a conference and although there’s room booked for her at the Ritz she’s decided to ditch it to live in their cabin and enjoy country life. Adam corrects her that theirs is the sixth biggest house on the block and that Pittsburgh’s a fully formed city. Andi quickly gets Adam out of the house under the ruse of getting Kelly’s bags out of the car and introduces Lowell to Kelly.

Adam hates the way she belittles Andi, who admits its hard but decides on taking the high road anyways. Lowell comes out requesting never to be left alone with Kelly again. Apparently, she called him Forrest Gump’s doppelganger. He finds it hard to believe she and Andi are sisters given how different they look. Andi reveals Kelly had some procedures done and Adam uneasily remembers Kelly’s popping neck that syncs to her blinking of her eyes.

The next day Andi presents an exquisite breakfast spread trying to make it look like a regular thing. Kelly distributes candies she got for the kids from her last business visit to Tokyo. They love it and say how uncommon this feast really is. Andi sends them upstairs and starts cleaning up. Adam dislikes how Kelly’s getting to Andi who still chooses the high road. She reveals her long-term plan of their 50th anniversary when she’ll be surrounded by her grandkids while Kelly will be wheelchair-bound hobbled with loneliness. That day they’ll be eye-to-eye, both secretly aware that Andi clearly won the game of life. Adam doesn’t want to wait that long and thinks of something quicker i.e. low road.

He meets with Don (Kevin Nealon) and Marcy (Kali Rocha) asking for the latter’s help as she’s known to be an ace at making other people feel bad about themselves. Marcy is humbled that her years of practice on Don has finally paid off. She recollects how during Andi’s wedding Kelly mentioned her yellow gown matching her teeth. Marcy has been holding grudges against her for eighteen years. She starts to think of ways to belittle her and confirms if Kelly’s got big feet. Adam agrees and compare them to a pair of canoes. Lowell joins the table and reveals a box of cookies he’s been gifted by a woman named Melanie (Tate Hanyok) who he met at the gym when he fainted on a stairmaster. They’ve been seeing each other for over a month. Adam is concerned and wants to meet Melanie once to make sure that she’s a right decision. Lowell agrees. The following day Melanie comes by and Adam inquires what are her intentions with Lowell. He also wants to know if she knows he’s got no money. Melanie says she knows and plans of putting her life insurance on him and simply get him on a stairmaster. Adam likes her sense of humor but leaves abruptly upon seeing Marcy enter.

Marcy and Adam prep for Kelly-attack. Kelly sits on the sofa and Adam introduces her to Marcy from that time they both met at his and Andi’s wedding. Kelly immediately comments on how she didn’t recognize Marcy who’s doing her best as far as aging is considered and walks off. Marcy is shook but picks up as soon as Kelly returns to the living room starting with what she said to her before. Andi comes to the scene and asks Adam what’s going on. Adam gives a blank look. Kelly repeats her aging comment. Marcy goes momentarily blank but comes back letting her know that she won’t bother about her lashing out as it’s a normal byproduct from fighting loneliness, especially after seeing Andi’s fully blossomed family. She continues how empty Kelly’s life would be, resting on top of two big feet. All this hits Kelly hard and she admits she’s jealous of Andi. She also reveals how she lost her job because of an embezzlement issue and had to make up the Tokyo story. Ready to move out, Kelly rushes upstairs to pack her stuff up. Andi hates seeing her so sad while Marcy complains to Adam that he never mentioned Kelly was such a softy. Andi realizes that Adam had put Marcy up to driving Kelly out of the house. She is angry as he didn’t abide by her high road policy.

In order to prevent argument Adam asks Emme (Hala Finley) to pretend to sleep holding his arm. If Andi saw her sleeping, she wouldn’t start fighting. This; however, doesn’t work as Andi spots the pretence. Instead, she realises how she always wanted revenge and have Kelly feel jealous of her. Adam is relieved. Andi decides to go speak to Kelly and basically hear more about how she’s feeling bad about her poor life.

Adam and Andi go to the bedroom where Kelly’s packing, but to their surprise she’s busy laying down with a glowing face and zero remorse. Despite Andi’s coaxing of getting her to repeat how sad and jealous she was feeling, Kelly remains peppy. Adam and Andi walk out in dismay closing the door behind them and out behind the door is Lowell standing in nothing but bermuda shorts with a guilt-ridden face. Andi there feels Kelly is sad but she covered up in time as they had knocked and entered. They decide to go in directly and swing open the door only to be shook to see partially-robed Lowell. Adam and Andi speak to Lowell and Kelly alternately to try to get them to limit their “thing” to a one night stand but it all goes in vain. Kelly is happy that she’s gotten a ready-made family man with kids thus giving her the bliss of family minus the bane of pregnancy. She packs up to move in with Lowell.

Andi is shook and tells Adam they cannot get complacent. Kelly cannot and should not live in Pittsburg with Lowell. She’s had enough of high road and now decides to go the lowest they’ve ever gone. Adam is overjoyed and and agrees that while high road might be the path to happiness as the low road will always remain the path to sweet revenge.

TO BE CONTINUED…