By: Kelly Kearney
Nobody is more excited and inspired by women’s professional sports than the generation of women who were never allowed on the field to prove they belonged there. In this week’s episode, emotions are high as the Lady Greyhounds, down their star player, head into a match with Bristol to take on one of the toughest teams in the league. Joining them for this epic game is Mae, who is invited onto the team bus for an up-close and personal look at the sport she dreamed of playing as a girl. Also in the hour, Keeley has a health scare followed by some surprising news that could change everything for her and Roy, while Rebecca and Higgins get closer to figuring out who is behind the buyout of the team’s shares. It’s ups, it’s downs, and it’s SCORE! in the penultimate episode of Ted Lasso.
Gemma J On The Bench, Keeley J on the Floor
We begin with a six-week time jump and the Lady Greyhounds trailing Southampton 1-nil. There are only three games left in the season, and this one is proving to be a challenge without their star player, Gemma J (Abbie Hern). She’s suited up and on the bench, but she’s not yet cleared to play.
From the stands, we see Keeley (Juno Temple) screaming f-bombs at the blind referees while Rebecca (Hannah Waddingham) and Zelda (Tracey Ullman), a bit calmer, enjoy her youthful enthusiasm. Even if, in Zelda’s day (the ’80s), they would’ve burned her for being a witch if she acted like that. Zelda is really pushing the BFF and co-worker vibes with Rebecca, even after her advice cost them the team doctor. She’s always sidled up beside her with some bizarre opinion that keeps Rebecca stuck between a laugh and a cringe.
Back down on the sidelines, Gemma is thirsty for some action. Even though her knee isn’t quite 100% yet, it hasn’t quelled her fire for the game. As her teammates struggle to put up points, she goes down the line of coaches trying to convince each one she’s ready. Ted (Jason Sudeikis) says no way. Beard (Brendan Hunt) just silently glares. Alice (Tanya Reynolds), who has patched things up with the star player ever since that impassioned plea to stay on the team, isn’t falling for Gemma’s act. Gemma sidles up to Alice and questions why she was the one who begged her to come back to the team, but now she won’t let her play. She loves getting a rise out of Alice, who refuses to admit she begged and jokingly tells Gemma not to stand too close to her. The tension between the two is still there, but now it’s more friendly banter with a dash of flirtation. That doesn’t mean Alice is letting Gemma play before she’s ready.
When it looks like Lizzie (Faye Marsay) might put a point up on the scoreboard, Keeley jumps up in excitement. When Lizzie misses the goal, Keeley faints. Surely she’s not so upset by her team falling behind that she passed out? She quickly comes to and acts like nothing happened, but Rebecca and Higgins (Jeremy Swift) look worried. Zelda, as always, is in her own world.
Keeley Gets Shocking News
After the team’s loss, Ted heads into the press room where everyone has questions about the injured Gemma and the team’s issues with offense. There are only two games left, and if they beat Bristol at their weekend match, they will clinch the final promotion spot and be heading to Nelson Road. The press questions how the women are handling the pressure–if they get promoted, their careers soar, but if they lose, their dreams of playing professional football might be over. Ted doesn’t like negativity, so he keeps smiling with his trademark “believe and win” optimism.
Meanwhile, Keeley heads down to get checked out by Caroline (Lauren Hendricks), and we get a reminder of what sort of character her mother is when she admits she inherited her high blood pressure alongside some of her favorite things, like competitiveness with board games, Irish butter, and boobs. Caroline can relate, but warns Keeley that these inheritances, not the bisexuality but the blood pressure, mean she needs to stay calm at these games. It’s probably why she passed out, though Caroline jokes she could also be pregnant. Keeley laughs that off until she checks her tracking app and realizes her last period was eight weeks ago. She’s four weeks late! Caroline hands her an industrial-sized box of pregnancy tests just as Keeley passes out from the shock.
Mind Reading and Game Strategies
“Howdy Mae,” Ted says to the pub owner (Annette Badand), who is both the biggest women’s football fan in Richmond and his landlord and part-time babysitter. She’s just as bummed as Ted over the team’s loss, but not enough to take the coach’s money for keeping an eye on Henry (Grant Feely). Who, by the way, tells his father about his own football success during the game Ted missed for “coaching a bunch of girls.” Ouch! Ted, you better talk to your boy about misogyny because that slip-up was full of it. Mae jokes that she bets it’s the other way around and the women are probably coaching Ted. He agrees, he’s learning a lot coaching these women that he never did leading the men’s team, though he had plenty of Kent/Tartt hissy fits to squash back then.
Speaking of Roy (Brett Goldstein), he’s at home making dinner while Keeley is in the bathroom taking a pregnancy test. He has no idea why she’s been in there so long, but when we see a dozen tests lined up and all positive, we know why. She doesn’t mention it to Roy, who is going on and on about her fainting incident possibly causing head trauma that could unlock “savant-level superpowers.” She stays quiet as he assumes she’s just too stressed out at work and needs to take a beat to relax. He suggests an end-of-the-season holiday, and she hollers a distracted “great” from the bathroom. She tosses the tests into the trash and covers them up with laundry and a bit of bathroom decor.
In Rebecca’s office, Higgins mentions Roy’s contract negotiations are still ongoing just as Zelda walks in late. She missed a meeting with Rebecca and doesn’t even bother to come up with an excuse. They move on and discuss the share sell-off. Higgins heard from Rupert’s (RIP Anthony Head) lawyers and claims they know nothing about these attempts to buy the team. There’s also been a pause in the buying, and Rebecca assumes it’s because he’s plotting his next move. Higgins puts Rebecca’s mind at ease when he says Rupert doesn’t have a chance, unless the Milk sisters sell their shares. Zelda’s ears perk up and she wonders where the sisters’ “udder” wealth comes from. Higgins admits he has no idea where the Milks stand on selling their shares because nobody has been able to reach them. This is a bad sign since they’ve sold them before to Rupert, but Higgins promises the sisters learned their lesson. They gave their word that the previous Rupert deal was a mistake.
Downstairs, Ted runs into Niamh (Aisling Sharkey) and Siobhan (Rex Hayes). When he asks them how their weekend went, he gets an earful. Like two people sharing one brain, they relay-run through a story about chasing down a wandering insomniac pig named Ooh Goobley. As storytellers go, they give Ted a run for his money, finishing each other’s sentences and even thoughts. As the story gets more and more ridiculous, Ted can hardly believe it, and questions its validity. According to the twins, it did happen… unless it was a dream. They’ve apparently shared those before too.
The sisters’ “ESP mind-melt thing” sparks an idea for how to fix the team’s offense problem. Ted walks into the coaches’ office to find Beard and Alice struggling to find a replacement for Gemma, they have the whiteboard out and magnets moving around to represent the players. Nothing seems right though, and Beard wonders if Shannon (Shannon Hayes) is ready to step off the bench and start. Alice, who has been riding the player hard, shuts that down instantly. “What about the twins?” Ted wonders. If they share some paranormal mind reading, could that skill translate to a win on the pitch? If they can stop fighting for a minute, they might be able to put that twinning energy to good use.
Their brainstorming takes a pause when Beard removes his hood, attached to a sleeveless vest, to reveal two pierced ears, blue contacts and a Jamie Tartt-inspired hairdo. He’s going through changes, and maybe those dating apps have him searching for his post-Jane self. Luckily, his best friend is too kind to laugh and point, while Alice just rolls her eyes and tries to stay focused on the whiteboard. Beard, in his non-twinning earrings, devises a strategy to use the sisters’’ mind reading to their advantage. That’s when Gemma interrupts to inject herself into the conversation and the game. The girl wants to play, and she is going to annoy Alice until they all say yes. It is still a firm no. Not until she’s cleared to play. Then Alice tosses her out of the office because their friendly banter is getting too distracting.
Two Moms and a Baby and Roy
Meanwhile, Rebecca and Keeley leave work at the office and go out for a wine and sushi lunch. The shareholder sell-off is driving Rebecca crazy, so some fun times with her bestie are exactly what she needs. It’s a “let the wine flow” sort of vibe, only Keeley declines the wine and the raw fish. What’s happening? She comes clean and tells Rebecca she’s pregnant, and the reaction is everything you’d want. First shock, then caution, and once Keeley admits she’s happy, an explosion of joy that has the entire restaurant watching them. It’s all hugs and squeals, but for a brief second Keeley checks in to make sure this isn’t hard for her friend. Rebecca always wanted her own child, but she promises Keeley her life is good with Matthijs and Jelka. Besides, anyone who has witnessed the love these two share knows Rebecca is going to spoil this Kent/Jones offspring rotten. It’s basically getting three parents– four if you count Roy’s non-romantic dance partner, Jamie Tartt. Suffice it to say, this baby will be loved, and Keeley is thrilled. She also admits she hasn’t told Roy yet because she wanted Rebecca to be the first to know, bringing tears to her friend and partner’s eyes. It’s an honor she doesn’t take lightly. The two do a good-luck toast followed by a teary-eyed and excited, “We’re having a baby!”
Later, at practice, Ted and the coaching staff try out the new formation with the twins. Alice spots Shannon struggling, pulls her aside and tells her she needs to get out of her head. She would be a great player if she just felt it in her body, the way Alice feels when she’s dancing. Apparently, Alice is a great dancer, just a terrible choreographer. Exactly like how Shannon is a great player, just terrible about letting loose and taking risks. Alice knows Shannon can be great, and after a little Alice boogie and shake, it’s time Shannon knows it too.
Up in the offices, Keeley is having baby daydreams when Roy comes in to check on her. She tells him she’s googling high blood pressure and suggests that instead of going to the game, maybe they just stay home and have a relaxing weekend. He agrees to cook for her, and promises no more cheering and screaming in excitement unless he gives her a reason to. As Roy leaves, she picks up her phone, not yet ready to tell anyone but Rebecca about the situation. She asks Siri if she’ll be a good mom, and while the chatbot can’t read the future, it tells her that most people who question whether they’ll be a good parent usually are.
Mae’s Ride to Glory
Down at the Crown & Anchor, Mae serves up a hearty meal and a hearty opinion about the match against Bristol. They beat Richmond last time, and she doesn’t want to see a repeat. Ted promises they’re going to give it their best shot and asks if she’s going to be at the game. A two-hour drive is a long trip for a woman her age, so the Richmond ladies’ biggest fan will have to skip this one. That is, until Ted decides to roll out the red and blue carpet for the pub matron and invite her on the team bus. Normally she wouldn’t want to be a bother, but she loves to be a bother, so she’s definitely in.
After a long day of practice, Alice is the last one out the door. As she locks up and heads to her car, she sees Shannon on the pitch practicing and taking her dancing words to heart. We watch her take the ball down the field, working on her technique, and all Alice can do is smile. Shannon has come a long way throughout the season. Alice has been on her case, but recently she saw something in the girl that was worth noticing, and now she’s rooting for her.
The following morning, the team is getting ready to board the bus, when Alice walks in with news. She just spoke to Caroline and the team doctor, and both have officially cleared Gemma to play. When Ted asks if Gemma knows yet, Alice pulls open the office blinds to reveal Gemma jumping and dancing with Caroline right outside the door.
On the bus, Ted calls for everyone’s attention with a “please give it up for the one and only Mae Green!” The Lady Greyhounds’ biggest fan is riding along for their game with Bristol. Players are excited to have their favorite fan along for the ride, especially when Ted tells the team to be on their best behavior and Mae nixes that immediately. She wants the full behind-closed-doors experience, good behavior be damned! They all welcome her to the back of the bus for a team photo and some card games to pass the time. This is Mae’s dream, and she can barely contain herself as the women welcome her like one of their own.
While the bus is bound to Bristol, management takes a plane. Rebecca boards while Higgins lets her know that even if the Milk sisters don’t sell their shares, someone could still acquire 49% of the team. Well, hello to you too, Higgins! Zelda is also on the plane settling in, eating her favorite airplane food: warm sushi. Rebecca can barely look at it, while Zelda hits up the bathroom and mentions her fear of being sucked out at 30,000 feet by the toilet flush.
“Naughty, Naughty, Keeley.”
The sushi reminds Rebecca of Keeley, so she shoots her a text reminding her not to watch the game while she’s supposed to be resting. When has Keeley ever listened to what she was told to do? She’s hiding from her boyfriend and her work wife, buried under a blanket with her earbuds and phone, watching the match. Roy is also there under Rebecca’s orders with food and a reminder to keep the game off. When it comes to Keeley, Rebecca proves she knows her girl well. Between her bossiness and Roy’s obedience, Keeley will get her restful day.
In the locker room before the biggest game the women have played yet, Ted opens the floor to Mae, who gives an inspiring speech. She talks about how, in her younger years, all she wanted to do was play football, but women weren’t permitted. It wasn’t that she was particularly good at the sport, but she had a passion for it nonetheless. She tells them they are different. They belong on that pitch, and she loves watching them play. It’s a reminder of how far women athletes have come, and as the Lady Greyhounds hope to beat Bristol in their season-defining match to secure promotion, we realize how much further we still have to go.
In the stands, Rebecca gets news that Mae is going to be sitting down near the field by the supporters’ section. In return, the pub owner gave her ticket to a familiar face, one who never misses a chance to flirt with Keeley and has now turned her charms onto Rebecca: Suzi Campbell (Fiona Marr).
Meanwhile, we see Mae’s got her pint ready and her voice set to scream for the Richmond Greyhounds to score their first goal. While at home, as Keeley is sneaking a viewing, her earbud drops out and the Bluetooth picks up on the speaker out in the kitchen where Roy is cooking her a meal. She’s busted! She immediately claims she was watching porn, not football, because that wouldn’t raise her blood pressure, right? Roy takes the phone, determined not to cross the boss lady or risk the health of the woman he loves, because let’s be real, Rebecca would break both of his legs if something happens to her. After a lot of begging, he finally agrees to let her watch with a huge caveat.
Back at the match with Bristol, the announcers notice Richmond’s new tactic on the pitch and wonder if it’s the right time to try something new in a game so crucial. The new technique doesn’t work right out of the gate, and goalie Katie “Boots” Quinn (Jude Mack) misses Bristol’s first goal attempt. The commentators talk about Quinn’s refusal to wear gloves and whether or not that would have stopped the goal. Boots must be thinking the same thing, looking down at their hands–that last save attempt really stung. They might even have a broken finger, not that they’re going to admit it anytime soon.
Out of Her Head and Into The Game
Back with Keeley, Roy decides to reenact the game only he can see by using the contents of Keeley’s makeup bag. He doesn’t use player names, he just gives her the highlights, like “frosted tips passes to squishy eye scissors.” The basics, minus the stressful details. If there’s one thing his niece Phoebe has taught the grumpy coach, it’s how to find his inner playfulness. It’s one of the things that is going to make him a good father, and Keeley must be thinking the same thing because she’s smiling as she watches the effort he’s making to keep her safe in the silliest possible way.
Back at the game, Bristol manages to score another goal. It’s 2-nil, and Gemma is itching to get thrown into the mix. Beard calls in some attackers to get the offense going, and Alice notices Shannon still sitting on second string. She motions for her to get on the field too, it’s where she belongs.
Meanwhile, every time there’s bad news from the game, Roy does his best to put a positive spin on it. “Nothing really matters… we’re all just stardust.” You get the picture. He’s working overtime to keep Keeley upright and conscious.
As things quickly unravel in the game, the coaches decide it’s finally time to put Gemma in. Alice stops her before she goes, reminding her that if anything feels off with that knee, she comes off the field. It’s better to leave the game than leave the sport. Gemma, cocky as ever, laughs it off and reminds her it’s just a knee injury, not like she’s losing her virginity. Ted tries to overhear what the two are talking about and asks Beard, but all Beard heard was, “Gemma might be a virgin.” Their game of telephone needs work.
The stadium cheers for Gemma J, and over in the owner’s box, everyone is cautiously intrigued and excited. During Gemma’s first possession, she trips and goes down, wincing at that knee. Everyone, from the coaches to the fans in the stands, starts to worry that the star player is hurt again. Alice panics like she knew this was going to happen, but with help from Lizzie and the rest of the team, Gemma gets up and stays in the game. She also takes her own penalty kick and scores! The stadium explodes, and so do the smiles on the players’ and coaches’ faces. Roy delivers the news to Keeley during a calm breathing exercise, but the game is fast-paced and exciting, so he has his work cut out for him.
Twinning Winning
At the end of the first half, Alice spots Gemma coming off the pitch with a slight wince in her step. Mae, exhausted from cheering and screaming, takes a seat to recharge for the second half. That is, until that infamous dance-off song football fans love blasts through the speakers. The horns sound, the beat drops, it’s House of Pain’s “Jump Around.” Mae looks at Shirley (Emma Crompton) sitting next to her, and the woman looks back. Taking a page out of Roy and Jamie’s book, the two women can’t help themselves, and they get down and dance.
In the locker room, Gemma is pumping up the team as they come in, but Alice pulls her aside to tell her she’s not playing the second half. She’s firm with her, as she can tell Gemma is in pain. Gemma admits she is, and then warns the coach that if they lose because she was pulled, she’ll be angry. Alice is with her on that, she’d be livid.
In the locker room, Beard notices Boots icing their hand, and nonchalantly slides in next to them on the bench. He hands them a pair of gloves and wraps it up in a life lesson: “What brings no benefit to the bee brings even less to the hive.” He knows why Boots doesn’t wear gloves, like to feel it, but he’d rather they feel what it’s like to get promoted with the team. With those words of wisdom, Boots puts on the gloves and gives them a try.
In the stadium, Mae is dancing, Rebecca is bra shopping on her phone, and down in the locker room, Ted tells Shannon she’s stepping in while Gemma steps out. Shannon is thrilled and thankful, hugging Ted almost teary-eyed. Nobody believed in her but him, and now she’s playing in the most important game of her life. Before Shannon leaves the locker room, Alice stops her with a little dance step to remind her of what they talked about. Shannon remembers, dancing back at her.
On the pitch, Shannon is still in her head at first and loses the ball, but when Alice reminds her to stop thinking, she picks up her step. So does Boots, who tries out those new gloves by defending the goal from another Bristol scoring attempt. Next, the twins rely on their brain meld as Siobhan gains possession and kicks it back to her waiting sister, Niamh, who shoots and scores! The crowd goes wild. It’s 2-2, and the game is tied. When Lizzie, with an assist from Shannon and Niamh, scores another, Mae, the fans and the owner’s box lose it. Keeley remains only mildly ecstatic at home.
That’s when Zelda gets called away about the Milk sisters, and it turns out she is actually behind the share sell-offs! She puts Hugo (Alex Blake), her despicable friend, on the job to convince the sisters to sell. He better come up with an amazing pitch because these two women don’t seem easily impressed or led astray.
Gloves, Goals, and Glory
Back on the pitch, Boots saves another goal and in the final seconds of the game, launches the ball in a hail mary pass to Shannon who gains possession and scores again! The game is over! The Lady Greyhounds win 4-to-2, and the team is getting promoted to the Super League! The crowd explodes into cheers, as the team– jumping and lifting Shannon and each other up in celebration. Even Keeley jumps into Roy’s arms back home, while Higgins and Rebecca celebrate in the box.
But where’s Mae?
She was just dancing and screaming for the team, and now, her seat is empty. Shirley looks concerned and motions for security, and we start to realize something is wrong. Everyone is celebrating down on the pitch, but in the stands, worry washes over the faces of the people sitting in Mae’s section. She’s on the ground and it doesn’t look good.
Meanwhile, Higgins turns to Rebecca, feeling bad that Keeley missed all of this since she would have loved it. Rebecca, full of excitement and loving nothing more than granting Keeley’s wishes, thinks she’d love it even more if the final match of the season was at Nelson Road, filling the whole place up. Dream big, ‘“Doer”, and make your little “Dreamer’s” dreams come true.
As Roy packs up the game’s make-up bag, talking to the shampoo, face creams and contour blushes, Keeley is just beaming at him. He notices she looks teary and asks what’s wrong. She shakes her head, “nothing,” and then she asks if she can tell him something. When he walks over, she whispers in his ear and shock washes over his face. He turns to her and says, “that’s the best f***ing thing I’ve ever heard in my life,” leaving the couple as happy as ever.
Back at the stadium, stadium employee Doug (Robert Beck) approaches Rebecca and Higgins with serious news: something has happened to Mae, and their excitement quickly turns somber.
A Win Leads to a Heartbreaking Loss
As the music grows we see a whole story play out on Rebecca’s face. She, quietly holding it together with her head held high, and sadness behind her eyes, makes her way down to the locker room where the team is celebrating their promotion. Ted spots Rebecca from across the room and motions for her to join in, but she nods and motions for him to come outside. His smile fades; he can tell something is wrong.
The music swells as the two meet, almost for the first time since the first episode. There haven’t been many interactions between Rebecca and Ted this season–two people who are arguably close friends and even closer confidants, just growing and living their lives, but more separate than before. Some of the most emotional scenes in the series happen between the boss lady and the coach, so there was a glaring absence of their weightier scenes that fans had been desperate to grasp onto. This is one of those scenes.
We don’t hear what Rebecca tells Ted, but his confident posture turns inward in an obvious punch-to-the-gut reaction to the news. Rebecca keeps her head high and stays strong for Ted, who is the more emotional of the two.
It seems like Mae won’t be riding the bus back to Richmond now that she’s entered the great big stadium in the sky, so to speak. She dreamed of a day like today, where she could see women play with heart and become champions. The culmination of all her desires as a young girl coming to fruition in the stands as she watched her hometown team get promoted. It’s not a bad way to go out, doing something you love, and it’s probably how she would have chosen to exit from this mortal coil. Still, it’s a heartbreaking goodbye to one of the funniest supporting characters in the series. Nobody could drop an f-bomb like Mae or insult you in the most maternal way possible. Ted, Henry, the Greyhounds, and all the patrons at the Crown & Anchor have grown from knowing her and will grow from the loss of her in ways we haven’t seen yet. Sometimes you don’t have to be a star on the pitch to make an impact, and that was Mae. From behind the bar to in the stadium’s stands, she was a guiding voice and an impactful character whose loss will be felt in Richmond for years to come. She will be missed.